Chapter 16-Just Missed The Train
A few weeks later, we find the newest couple at Hogwarts kissing in a broom closet, something they do frequently. James and Maimee were finished with their homework and were spending a little quality time with one another before James had to go on rounds.
Maimee's long blonde hair felt like silk against James's fingers. He smiled. Maybe he and Maimee were good for each other after all. She was a great kisser.
They broke apart and smiled at one another.
"James, there is something I want to say," Maimee said.
"What's that Maimee baby?" James asked.
"Well, I know we haven't been dating all that long. It just feels like we're getting serious more quickly than one would usually expect. What I'm trying to say is, James Potter, I.." she said, trailing off.
He looked her in the eyes and smiled.
"You what?" he asked her.
"I love you," Maimee said.
"You what?" James asked, surprised by her bluntness.
"I love you James Potter. These weeks have been the best in my life," Maimee said, her navy eyes sparkling. He knew she meant it.
"I-I-" James stuttered, unsure of what to say. She placed a finger over his lips to silence him.
"I don't need to hear it. I just wanted you to know that's how I feel," Maimee said. She combed her fingers through her hair and adjusted her shirt and left the broom closet.
"Damn," James said to himself. She was gone by the time he reached the outside of the closet. She was in the
Gryffindor Common Room most likely.
.X.
He made his way back to the Heads Room, where he saw Lily, crying on the couch, yet again. She had been doing that frequently.
He saw her and just kept walking. A few months ago he would have asked what was wrong, but now he just couldn't. She was long gone for him. Something he could never reach.
He sat down at his desk and began doodling. They still had an hour before rounds.
That's when he heard her. The voice of an angel.
"James?" she asked him.
He turned his head to see her cheeks blotched red with tears and her eyes puffy from crying. She was still beautiful.
"Yeah Lily?" he asked her.
"Am I a broken-?" she hiccupped. "Am I a broken person?"
He stared at her in amazement. She thought she was broken? He himself had been thinking the exact opposite.
"What do you mean? Who told you that?" he asked her, walking over to sit on the couch.
"No one did. I just don't know what to think anymore. I don't know what people think of me and I am sure I don't want to know," Lily said.
"You're not broken, Evans," James said, reassuring her.
"But I am cold. I know I am. You yourself could justify that point," Lily said.
"You're not cold either. You just don't like me. Understandable. Not many people do. You're not mean to everyone. Maimee says you're a great friend," James said.
What does Maimee know? Lily thought to herself.
She fiddled with her ruby ring on her pinkie finger.
"I don't know how anyone can perceive me anymore. I used to be so assured as to how I ran my life and what I did. Now, I just don't feel anything. I feel numb to it all," Lily said.
"Lily, I know how people think of you. They think you're smart, beautiful, nice, funny, and most of all a good person. You know that and I know that. What's the real reason you're asking me a question?" James asked.
"Why did you give up on me James?" she asked quietly.
He sure hadn't expected that. She cared that he didn't pursue her anymore? What was wrong with that picture? Was Lily Evans coming around when he had finally given up on his goal since fourth year?
"Evans? Are you ok?" James asked.
"I-I'm fine James. I just need to know. Why did you give up on me? Was it because I was cold? Was it because I was a broken person?" she asked him, lifting her head up so he could see her emerald green eyes, absorbing every ounce of power they possessed.
"No Lily, it's not because you're not any of those things. I'm lonely. Well, I was lonely. I can't wait around for you forever. It's probably better if we're just friends anyway," James said. He partially believed what he was saying himself.
"So, there's no chance for us? Ever?" Lily asked.
"I can't answer that Lily. You know I can't. I have a girlfriend. She is your best friend. It's just not right," he said to her.
"I hate you, James Potter," she whispered. He heard every word. It stung.
"You hate me?" he asked.
"I hate how you make me feel. One minute I hate you with every ounce of integrity and the next you make me feel like I'm falling fast. It's an amazing feeling but scary at the same time. I don't want to be in love, not with you anyways," she said.
"L-L-Love?" he stuttered out. That was the second time that night that a beautiful girl had told him that they loved him.
Normally, any guy would be floating in bliss at this point, but at that moment, it did not feel good. Not at all. He had missed his chance.
Before anything could happen, she seized his lips to hers and wrapped him in the most delightful kiss he could imagine. He enjoyed it, but deep down, he knew it was wrong. What about Maimee? He did something he knew he never would have done.
He backed away from Lily Evans's soft lips and muttered "I can't." Her aroma was still on him as he left the Heads Room.
He left her there crying, more confused than she had been when he had entered.