Chapter 35-Groovy Guy
I'm so charming and adorable I'm sure that you can see
And everyone's always trying to hang around with me
They tell me I'm the greatest and it's hard to disagree
'cause I'm so perfect in every way
And I'm so cute i can hardly stand it
And I'm so handsome honey i could just die
I know that you'll never be as wonderful as me but at least you can try
'cause I'm such a groovy guy
"Oh, Mac, you are so lucky," one girl gushed.
The annual Sirius Black Fan Club meeting was being held and everyone was discussing what had happened last week at the lake.
"He had the Giant Squid throw me in the lake," Mackenzie pointed out.
"And?" another girl asked. "If he paid that much attention to me, I think I would die!"
"Die?" Arielle Prewett asked. "I wouldn't die. If I died then who would hold me in their strong muscular arms? No, I would stay alive and slip on something so he would catch me before I fell. It would be proclaimed a national holiday."
"Ladies," Mac said, interrupting the girls' thoughts of Sirius. "The point is that this is not something Sirius Black would do. He has been corrupted."
"Corrupted? You don't mean kidnapped, do you? That would be just tragic, Mac," Arielle said, a look of despair dawning on her already clueless face.
"I don't mean kidnapped, Arielle," Mac proclaimed. "I mean, he has been tampered with. I think Addy has been messing with his brain. Nothing besides that could interfere with our true love."
"What are we to do?" the girl asked, clearly shocked as well as appalled.
"The Easter holidays are approaching in two weeks time and I plan on going home with my sister. Sirius, of course, is most likely going to the Potter's. The plan is to visit him there without Addy interrupting us and transform him back into the righteous man he is," Mac plotted aloud.
"You are such a genius," Arielle said. "You're sure to get top marks on your NEWTS."
"So, you're saying your own flesh and blood would do this to you?" one girl asked.
"Oh yes, Mary. You don't know the kind of deception that lies behind Addison's frail and delicate mind. She may look innocent but really she is a conniving man-eater who'll take a decent man and transform him into a Squid-talker," Mac sputtered.
She looked clearly serious as to her huge accusations against her only twin sister.
"Wow, he speaks Squid?" Arielle asked. "I wish I could speak Squid."
"All hail Sirius Black," all the girls chanted. They were inside a small, broom closet with very little space for anything. They did however have a huge, blown up picture of Sirius Black. They had ordered huge Sirius blow up dolls but they didn't fit in the closet.
"I envy you, Mackenzie," Mary said. "Sirius Black is totally in love with you."
"I know," Mac said, forgetting her resentful feelings. "He talked to a squid for me!"
All the girls squealed in triumph.
.X.
"Lily, dearest, what on Earth are you doing?" James asked, seeing Lily at the breakfast table with books and quills sprawled out everywhere.
"Studying, James," Lily muttered, unable to focus her attention on anything other than what she was reading.
"Did I just hear the word-studying?" Sirius hissed, slightly insulted.
"Yes, you did Sirius," Lily said. "Now please stop pestering and continue consuming every ounce of food on this table."
"If you wish," Sirius said. He grabbed the pitcher of orange juice and started gulping juice straight out of it.
Addison sat down and noticed what Sirius was doing.
"I think it's time to reconsider our relationship," Addison said, disgusted.
"I think it's time to reconsider our relationship," James said, disgusted.
"What?!?" Lily and Sirius asked, focusing their attention away from their current way to occupy time.
"I can't go out with a slob," Addison said. "It's unhygienic."
"I can't deal with studying," James replied. "It's immoral."
"Addy, you're a slob. I saw your room in Miami," Sirius pointed out.
"I don't drink out of orange juice that will be served to the entire Gryffindor table," Addison said, pointing to the nearly empty pitcher of orange juice.
"You flatter me, babe," Sirius said, pretending to blush. Addison just rolled her eyes, fight forgotten.
"Come on Lils, NEWT's aren't until June," James claimed.
"You do realize that the NEWT's determine whether we get a successful job in the wizarding world, right?" Lily questioned. James nodded, assured that he did indeed know this.
"Lily, you don't understand the logic of a Marauder," Sirius explained, stopping himself from eating his seventh pancake. "We feel that studying only disturbs the brain even further. We choose to be mellow and not participate in such a hazardous activity."
"Remus is studying," Lily pointed out, looking over at Remus Lupin and Maimee Hout who were indeed studying together.
"Well, he's the black sheep if you catch my drift," Sirius said, brushing it off.
"If you tried studying, Sirius, you'd be a whole lot smarter," said Lily.
"I don't need to study to be smart. I already feel I have a preposterous amount of intelligence to go around," Sirius answered, smiling.
"You know, using big words in sentences does not make you smarter, it just makes you desperate for attention," Lily remarked.
"I have no idea of the vindictiveness in which you claim to have seen," Sirius said.
"That doesn't make sense," Addison quipped. "Excuse him, he forgot to get medicated for being stupid this morning."
"You're just feeling a gargantuan amount of jealousy as to my quick wit and the cornucopia amount of words in my vocabulary," Sirius speculated.
"Come on Sirius, we're going to go see Madam Pomfrey now," Addison said, dragging Sirius off to the nurse's office.
"Poppy, I love Poppy with every aspect of my diligence," Sirius preached.
"Again, bunch of bull," Addison reminded him.
"He is really getting odder by the day," Lily observed thoughtfully, leaving behind her studying.
"We think it's because every morning his head slams into the bunk, damaging his brain more and more," James recalled.
"And you don't stop him from doing this?" Lily asked.
"No, it's pretty entertaining," James insisted.
"I'll take your word on that," Lily said.
"So, where do you plan on going for Easter break?" James sparked, igniting a new topic for their conversation.
"Oh, probably Addy's house," Lily mentioned. "I go every year."
"Well, this year is a little different from every year," he observed. "How about coming to my house this year?"
"Hmm," Lily contemplated. "No supervision in a big manor with you and Sirius. I'll have to pass."
"Honest, it'll be a great time. We can even have Addy and Maimee over whenever you'd like," he offered.
She thought about it and saw the pleading look in his eyes. She grinned and nodded.
"Ok, as long as you two don't drive me crazy before the vacation is over," she persisted.
"I can't promise you that," James reasoned. "Sirius may still be going on about his big word trip. You know him, he doesn't forget things easily."
"Addison, that is a remarkable camouflage of clothing you are wearing today."
Sirius' voice could be heard outside the Great Hall.
"You daft lunatic, those words don't make sense!" she bellowed.
Everyone in the Great Hall collapsed in laughter.
A/N: I often find myself in the same predicament as Sirius. Using big words in sentences is fun! You should try it some time.