Chapter 18-Somebody Told Me
"There is one thing I must ask before we go through with this," Sirius said, slowly, his voice quavering.
Was he getting second thoughts about switching places?, Addison wondered.
"Go ahead Sirius," Addison said, inhaling deeply.
"You don't have your monthly do you?" he asked, his face contorting into fear.
Addison and Remus laughed.
"Not that it's your business, but no. I don't get it for another week. And I shaved my legs just for you," Addison said, still laughing. Sirius was trembling but a look of relief showered onto his face.
"Thank Merlin," Sirius said.
"Is there anything I should know about you before I switch?" Addison asked.
"Nope, not really. I am a normal, healthy boy who does not shed blood from danger zones once a month. And my legs? I'm all natural," Sirius said.
Addison rolled her eyes.
"Remus, do the charm so we can get this over with," Addison said.
He flicked his wand and in an instant, Addison was Sirius and Sirius was Addison. They looked at each other hoping nothing had gone wrong.
"You're me!" Sirius squealed.
"Let's get this done as soon as possible," Addison said. Her voice was deep and mature, unlike her own.
"But, I want to fix my hair!" Sirius said, his voice high pitched.
"I don't sound like that!" Addison said, hearing her own voice.
"Uh, yeah you do," Remus and Sirius said.
"Liars!" Addison said.
"We're here for Lily and James," Remus said.
"Let me just put some finishing touches on this," Sirius said.
"I don't need any touching up Sirius. Let's just go," Addison said.
"But Addy, I could get you some dates for this weekend. You never show off what you've got," Sirius said.
"With good reason. I don't want perverts like you hitting on me," Addison said.
"Hey, I take offense to that!" Sirius said. He pursed his lips and pouted at Remus.
"Ok, let's go," Remus said, leading them out of the Room of Requirement.
"Wow, you're short Addy," Sirius said.
"You're walking like you've got a load on your back. Stand straight Sirius or people will start calling me Quasimodo," Addison said.
"Blah Blahdy Blah," Sirius said, mimicking Addison.
"Oh, deal with it," Remus said to both of them. "Padfoot, you make one hormonal girl."
"Ok, me and Sirius are going to the Common Room. Addy, you go to the Heads Room and wait for Lily. See of Oleander will let you in," Remus said.
"But he wouldn't last time," Addison said.
"Maybe because you're Sirius he will. Lie," Remus advised.
"I'm a bad liar though," Addison said.
"Tell him that you left your tap dancing shoes in there and you need them for Prefect duty." Sirius said. His face was perfectly serious. Addy saw her own blue eyes staring deeply into her own. Which was odd.
"But you're not a Prefect," Addison said.
"It's a stupid curtain. Do you really think that it will know whether I'm prefect or not?" Sirius asked. He and Remus had turned the corner when Addison was about to reply. She made her way to the Heads Room by herself.
She met Oleander. His white head was bobbing in and out of the blue and white silk curtains.
"Let me in," Addison said, bravely, keeping her tone steady.
"Why should I Mr. Black?" Oleander asked mischievously.
"I need to talk to Lily," Addison complained.
"Not a good enough reason for me," Oleander said, a grin on his face.
"GRAHAM CRACKERS! Let me in!" she shouted.
"Temper Tantrums? Wow, what has the male population come to?" Oleander asked.
"I lied before. I don't want to see Lily. I left my tap dancing shoes in there and I need them for Prefect duty," Addison said, using Sirius's ridiculous alibi.
"Why didn't you say so?" Oleander asked. The curtains spread and in Addison went.
"Stupid curtain," she muttered.
She walked in and saw Lily sleeping on the couch. She went over and tapped her on the shoulder.
"Lily, Lily, LILY!" she shouted.
Lily opened her eyes and jumped as she saw Addison.
"What?" Addison asked.
"Sirius, how did you get in here?" Lily asked.
"Oh, Oleander let me in," Addison said.
"And he wouldn't let Addy in? I really don't like that curtain. Peeves would be a better guard for the door," Lily said. "What do you want?"
"Well Lily, I came to talk to you about James," Addison said.
"What about him?" Lily asked.
"Well, I know that you like him and all and I thought well, you should know some things about him," Addison said.
"Addison told you? I'm gonna kill her," Lily said, gritting her teeth.
"Don't. I made her tell me," Addison lied.
"Whatever. I don't like him anymore. It's hopeless. There is no chance for us. James has told me that," Lily said sadly.
"But he really does like you! He just doesn't want to break Maimee's heart," Addison said.
"I know. He has morals. Something I never knew," Lily said, holding onto a pillow and hugging it.
"You don't know a lot of things. He really does feel the same way. He just kind of lost hope in you guys," Addison explained.
"I guess I kind of gave him that impression as well," Lily said.
"Kind of? You patronize the guy a lot," Addison said.
"What do you know Sirius?" Lily asked angrily.
"I know that you want to be with him. I know he wants to be with you too," Addison said.
"Why are you being so mature about all of this Sirius?" Lily asked, smiling.
"I don't know. I just think it's important," Addison said.
"Thanks," Lily said. She got up and hugged Addison.
"No problem, that's what friends are for," Addison said.
"So, how's that little thing you have going with Addy? She likes you a lot," Lily said.
"WHAT?!? Is that what you tell him? It's completely not true," Addison yelled.
"What are talking about? Are you really as insane as Addison describes you?" Lily asked, laughing.
"That's more like it," Addison mumbled. "Me and Addison McKinnon are not an item and never will be."
"I thought you were going to ask her out?" Lily asked.
"I was?" Addy asked, completely bewildered.
"Yes, you were. You told me that last week," Lily said.
"I did?" Addison asked, shocked.
"Earth to Sirius! Hello? We were talking about our relationship problems. Fond memories, I know," Lily said.
"Well, Lils, it's been real. I hope I helped you. I need to go talk to Addison right now," Addison said.
She did too, Sirius had some explaining to do once they changed back.
.X.
"Addy, you're not paying attention are you?" Maimee Hout asked her friend. The two were playing wizard's chess. What Maimee didn't know was that Addison was really Sirius undercover and this whole game was a set up.
"Oh yes Maimee darling, I am. Have I told you how that skirt accentuates your long legs?" Sirius asked.
"A few times Addy. Have you been reading your sister's Muggle magazines?" Maimee asked.
"Muggle magazines? The ones where the pictures don't move? What a bore. I never would do that on my own free will," Sirius said, disgusted. He was looking for Remus. Moony was supposed to come over and flirt with Maimee five minutes ago.
"Come on Moony, don't be a pansy," Sirius muttered.
"What? Is that some sort of code you and your chessmen have?" Maimee asked.
"Oh, why yes it is!" Sirius said.
Remus walked over to the Chess table slowly, Sirius looking into his eyes trying to send vibes to him.
"Way to be a man, Remus," Sirius said through gritted teeth. Remus's excellent hearing caught this and he just smiled.
"Yes, you're doing a great job at that Padfoot," Remus said. Sirius sent evil eyes and bad mental vibes to Remus.
"Oh look Maimee, our dear friend Remus Lupin has showed up to watch us play chess. Isn't he a dear? What do you say we flash him?" Sirius asked.
"Addy, what is up with you today? She has not been herself. I think Sirius Black may have slipped something in her pumpkin juice," Maimee said, looking at her friend with a small bit of fear.
"Oh, Maims, that's a good idea actually," Sirius said.
"See what I mean?" Maimee asked, looking at Remus. His stomach did butterflies.
"You look nice Maimee," Remus said, pulling up a chair and sitting next to them, watching their game.
"Doesn't that skirt accentuate her long legs?" Sirius asked.
"Sure, Addison," Remus said, uncomfortably.
"So, Maimee, you know Sirius Black. Isn't he hot?" Sirius asked her.
"Um, I have a boyfriend Addy. I don't really want to look at yours," Maimee said.
"She said I was her boyfriend?" Sirius asked with excitement.
Remus sent a look to Sirius to sit down and shut up.
"I mean, yeah, that's cool. Your own choice not to stray your eyes to the other hot males in the Hogwarts Population. I mean, Remus here is absolutely adorable. Aren't you Remus ol' buddy?" Sirius asked. He reached over the chess board to pinch at Remus's cheeks.
"So cute, so absolutely cute. Don't you think Maim babe?" Sirius asked.
"Sure," Maimee said.
"Look, it's Jamesie! I must go have a chat for ol' times sake. Oh Jamesies!" Sirius said in a shrill voice.
"She really is being weird," Maimee said. She and Remus were sitting close and she couldn't help but
notice. But, her boyfriend was in the same room. Yet, he seemed to be talking to Addison.
.X.
"Prongs, it's me," Sirius said.
"Addison, how do you know my nickname? Did Sirius tell you? I'll kill him," James said, gritting his teeth.
"No, no, no. This is Sirius. I am Sirius. Sirius Orion Black. Your best mate. I taught you the ways of women. I am the Pouncing Padfoot. I intrigue the minds of young ladies all over Hogwarts," Sirius said.
"Addison, you've gone crazy. I bet Sirius put you up to this," James said.
"Oh yes, you're absolutely right. I have gone off my rocker. Quick, someone help me. How about St. Mungos? I hear the white walls blend in well with the munchkins dancing around in my head. Yes, it would be a pleasure to spend the rest of my insane life over in that hospital. An absolute delight," Sirius said in monotone, rolling his eyes. James really was daft.
"I left Remus and Maimee alone over there. I must say your friend needs help on charming the ladies," Sirius said.
"I could have told you that. Maybe she'll find that cute," James said hopefully.
"Ad-I mean Sirius went to talk to Lily," Sirius said.
"Why Sirius and not you?" James asked.
"My face reassures Maimee that Remus is genuine," Sirius said. James gave him a look.
"Ok, well Sirius is so debonair that he could convince Lily to still like you," Sirius said.
"Oh. OK," James said.
"Stupid git," Sirius muttered.
"What?" James asked.
"I said Make-up Kit. I need to order a make-up kit," Sirius said. He chuckled to himself inside.
"Did I really need to know that?" James asked.
"Yes! Maimee is your girlfriend isn't she?" Sirius asked.
"Well, yeah she is," James said.
"Don't bother me with your stupid accusations," Sirius said.
"Going insane. I swear to Dumbledore that she is going insane. Losing her marbles, she is," James said.
.X.
"Maimee, I really like you. A lot," Remus said. Maimee blushed.
"I like you too, Remus," she said.
"I wish that you and James weren't together. He's been going on and on about how he's felt so restrained since he's been in a relationship. I just yell at him and tell him how lucky he is to have you," Remus said.
"You do?" Maimee asked hopefully.
"Of course. It's the truth," Remus said. He smiled.
And they said he had no charm.
A/N: Please review