I own nothing.
**
Chapter 9: Foreshadowing
[You, by Switchfoot]
November 16, 1977
"Ow, James! You stepped on my foot!"
"Don't be such a baby Peter."
"Will you both shut up?"
"Go away, Siri-poo."
"That was un-called for. And traumatizing. Never call me that again."
"Can we please hurry?" said a raspy voice.
"Yea," said James. "Come on guys, Remus wants us to hurry."
"Are you okay, mate?" asked Peter.
"Yea, I'm fine. We're just a little behind schedule tonight."
"Are you okay, Sirius?" asked James. His friend was being unusually quiet.
"What? Oh, yea. I'm fine. Life's brill."
James raised his eyebrows. "Right…" he said as they passed through the doors of the Great Hall. "Where's Evans tonight?"
"Library. Things have been a lot easier since she knows Remus is a werewolf. A lot less sneaking around. Although she's probably in the library trying to find out how we're staying with Remus…"
James stopped dead in his tracks and so did the other three boys. "What? Do you know how smart that girl is? What makes you think she won't figure it out?"
"I pointed her in the wrong direction," Sirius shrugged, not offering anymore information. The other boys tried to drag it out but he kept his mouth shut.
"So, this Sunday, huh?" asked said Peter, changing the subject.
A tense silence filled the air under the cloak and Sirius hit Peter lightly on the shoulder.
"Yea," said James. "His funeral is this Sunday."
"And Evelyn?" asked Sirius eagerly.
"Really, Sirius," Remus chided. "If you didn't have Lily as a girlfriend I'd think you were in love with Evelyn!"
"So…I still don't understand how we're going to do this," said Sirius.
"Do what?" James said as Peter transformed and touched the knot that froze the willow.
"How we're going to get Lily's parents to-James!"
James tripped over a root and sprawled on the ground. He winced in pain as his ankle twisted uncomfortably and something sharp dug into his thigh. "Damn," he swore quietly. "Damn, damn, damn."
"Go, Remus!" Sirius cried loudly. "Go now!"
There was flurry of robes as Remus ran down the tunnel as fast as he could. Sirius grabbed James under the armpits and dragged him out of reach of the willow's branches. "Where's Peter?" Sirius growled as James tried to sit up.
"I think he went down. Sirius, I can't do this tonight!"
Sirius hesitated for a moment. "I'll take you to the hospital wing."
"But Remus-"
"I'll just make sure you get into the castle, okay? Then if anyone finds you the penalty won't be as harsh."
"Okay, mate," James sighed. "Fine."
"Good," said Sirius. He pulled James to his feet and supported him as they walked back to the castle. Once inside, James leaned against the wall and Sirius strode back out to the Great Doors. There was a slam of doors closing and James shrunk back into the shadows as Filch grabbed Sirius by the arm.
"So, thought you'd sneak out of the castle, eh? You're going to get suspended for this one, Black! Come on, to my office!"
James watched in dismay as Sirius was led off. He threw a look at James over his shoulder and James hesitated before moving towards the great staircase. Remus could take care of himself, just this one night…and he had Peter…just this one night.
James fell to the ground for the second time that night as someone crashed into him. Unfortunately, he was on a flight of stairs and he slid down a few before his senses returned and he grabbed the railing.
"Oh, shit!" said a soft voice above him. He looked up.
"Evans! What the hell are you doing down here?"
"Potter? Oh, you have no idea how good it is to hear your voice!"
There was silence before James spoke slowly. "I'm sorry, have we met? My name is James Potter. And yours would be-"
"Stop it, James! How is everyone?"
"What are you talking about? Well, I suppose Sirius is with Filch because he got caught leaving again and Peter and Remus are down at the willow."
"And Snape?"
James froze. He literally stopped breathing. Sirius had to have been joking…
Snape walked off after delivering his latest insult about James's father. James stared after him with a white face as Lily approached them from the dinner table.
"Mind if I throw him in the Shrieking Shack with Remus?" Sirius asked sarcastically.
"Not at all," James said with a straight face.
"Fuck!" he yelled. "How do you…"
"I heard him in the library. He was talking to himself. Saying horrible things about you and Sirius and Remus and Peter and how he was finally going to figure out what you were all up to."
"Evans, whatever you do, you stay here. Do you understand me? You are not going to go out there! You have no way of protecting yourself," he said, hauling himself to his feet. His ankle was slightly better, but not by much.
"And you do? I'm coming with you!"
James gritted his teeth. They were just wasting time. "Listen, Evans. Just-find a way to help Sirius. Get him out of Filch's office and whatever you do, don't get caught. You can't afford to get caught."
Lily opened her mouth to protest but James was already hobbling down the steps. He slammed open the doors, not caring how much noise he made, and walked as fast as he could with his injured ankle to the willow. The branches were just beginning to move again and James picked up a stick that was handily lying on the ground. He quickly prodded the knot in the tree and ducked into the tunnel.
It was musty and dank as always. James thought he saw the imprints of footsteps in the dim light filtering from the opening, but he may have imagined them. His ankle as throbbing painfully but her ignored it, supporting himself against the tunnel wall as he dragged himself along.
He heard the sounds of laboured breathing ahead of him and quickened his pace. He considered changing into his stag form but dismissed the idea. A leg injury on an animal was much worse than one on a human.
Snape came into view and James called out to him. "Snape! Stop!"
The Slytherin boy whirled to look at James and bared his teeth. "Potter," he spat. "What are you doing down here?"
"Stop moving!" ordered James. "You don't want to keep on moving! You aren't going to like what's at the end of this tunnel."
"Lupin's down there, isn't he? There's something strange about Lupin and I'm going to find out!" Snape cried turning and walking away briskly. James felt for his wand in his pocket so he could perform a stunning spell and realized with a start that it wasn't there.
He searched frantically on the ground for his wand and swore viciously when he didn't find it. "Accio!" he muttered desperately. Nothing happened and he hurried forward to stop Snape, limping slightly. He could hear agonized cries echoing down the passage as they drew closer to the place where Remus was transforming.
"Snape," James snarled, "if you don't stop walking…" The end of the tunnel was in sight and James noticed with a detached sort of horror that the door leading to the shack was open.
The agonized screams stopped slightly and so did the two boys in the tunnel. James's ankle, which had seemed to be better before, was now aching as if someone had hit it repeatedly with a hammer.
The hairs on the back of James's neck stood up and he snapped out of his reverie, hurrying forward and grabbing Snape's robes. Snape whirled and kicked James in the leg, hitting the spot just above his kneecap. James's ankle crumpled and he fell to the ground.
"Snape, you bastard! Don't you see that-point that thing somewhere else!"
Growls and snapping sounds could be heard behind the door as Snape pointed his wand squarely between James's eyes.
"For years I've watched you get all the glory," he spat. "I've watched you weasel your way out of detention and suspension and expulsion. You're nothing but an arrogant bastard without any parents and you think you're better than me. They all think you're a damn pureblood," he whispered, a manic glint in his eyes. "Well I know better. Your mum was a mudblood and I'm going to tell the entire world the first chance I get. You and your idiotic friends are stupid if you think I wouldn't figure it out! Are you sneaking off to Hogsmeade every month? Does Lupin feed some disgusting pet and you're down here to help him? I'm going to find out and there's nothing you can do about it!"
"Snape," James began cautiously, but he was cut off as a loud scratching sound was heard against the door. Snape dropped his wand and it rolled away, sliding down the slanting ground.
Snape cursed and James struggled to his feet, resting his weight on his right leg and letting his left ankle rest. "Come on, Snape!" he shouted, frustrated. "We have to go!"
Something hard hit the back of James's head just as a loud ripping sound was heard from behind the door. Snape jumped and James was oddly satisfied by his fright. James reached for whatever had hit him and gaped as he recognized his wand. I summoned it, but I didn't have a wand to do it…
Without thinking he pointed his wand at Snape just as the door burst open and a fully grown werewolf burst from the shack. Snape backed up as Remus snarled at him and bared his teeth.
"Stupefy!" James shouted, watching with satisfaction as Snape fell to the ground. "Mobilicorpus!" he said then, flicking his wand and sending Snape back to the mouth of the tunnel. He was so distracted by this he didn't realize that Remus had jumped at him.
"Aaa!" he cried, hissing in pain as the werewolf's claws dug into his arm. "Damn, Remus! It's me."
His attempts of telling his friend who he was failed and he brought up his wand with shaking hands and pointed it at the werewolf, who had backed up and was getting ready to pounce.
In a split second a millions thoughts passed through James's head. He's my best friend and I've never pointed a wand at him in my life, and here I am about ready to blast him into a wall…
"Expelliramus!" he cried, uttering the disarming charm. Remus flew back into the room and his furry body hit the back wall with a sickening thud. A small form scurried out of the room and down the tunnel. Thanks for the help, Peter, James thought bitterly.
With a sigh he stepped into the room, shutting the door and locking it behind him. He trained his wand on his friend again, his hand shaking. He could transform but he just didn't have the energy, and he readied himself for a long night.
**
James and Remus lay in their respective beds in the hospital wing; James was staring at the ceiling with is arms folded beneath his head, and Remus was sleeping. He looked incredibly worn out as it was and he needed the rest.
This is mad, James thought. I can't believe Sirius is such an idiotic prat…
"James?"
James sat up in his bed and glared at his friend.
"What do you want?" he asked, cringing as he realized he sounded like a petty two year old.
"I wanted to-to-"
"To apologize?" James suggested harshly. "Is that what you want? Did you know?"
Peter whimpered slightly and backed away. "I didn't-he made me promise not to-"
"Are you mad?" asked James incredulously. "Snape could've died!"
"Wh-why do you care anyways?" asked Peter. "You hate Snape. You said yourself; he's going to end up serving You-Know-Who because he's so obsessed with the Dark Arts. Wh-why do you care?"
"Not enough to kill him!" hissed James. "Don't you realize that's just going to bring you down to his bloody level? Do you want to be like Snape, Peter?"
"Well then why aren't you yelling at Sirius?" Peter said hotly. "You think you're so important because you have the Head Boy badge! You aren't perfect at all. You're just a-"
"That's enough, Peter," said a soft voice from the doorway of the hospital wing. "Leave him alone."
"And you!" said Peter, his voice quivering. "Prancing around with Sirius and flirting with James all the while. You make me-"
"Wormtail," snapped James angrily, "she's right. That's enough."
"Fine," muttered Peter, pushing past Lily and slamming the door to the wing shut behind him. James was amazed that Snape, who was lying in the bed on the other side of him, didn't wake up.
"I don't understand," cried James. "He's never said anything like that before!"
"I think it's been building up for a long time," said Lily quietly, standing by his bedside and glaring at him.
"What's wrong with you?" asked James.
"How dare you!" hissed Lily. "You lured Snape down there! He could have been seriously hurt!"
"But you heard him yesterday! You didn't blame me when we met on the stairway!"
"I was worried!" cried Lily. "All of you and Snape were out there! I can't believe you would be so petty and childish as to do something like this! You could've killed him!"
"What's he ever done to defend you?" asked James angrily. This is ridiculous. How can she think I would do something like that?
"I thought you had changed!" shouted Lily. "I really thought you had! I was actually starting to-to value you as a bloody friend!"
That isn't what she was going to say…
"You make me sick. What kind of selfish, arrogant, childish, bastard would do something so-so cruel to another human being?"
"I would," someone said. Sirius stepped into the room and shut the door with a foreboding click. "I did it, Lily. I lured him out there. I didn't mean to-"
Lily turned her face from Sirius's explanation and looked at James, who had pulled on his robes over the hospital pyjamas. Her face was pale and her green eyes stood out shockingly bright. "I'm sorry," she murmured. "You're just-"
"--always the culprit," said James bitterly. "I'm the easy one to blame. I was prick for four years so I may as well be one for the rest of my bloody life. Don't worry, Evans, you've made this quite clear and I'm sure I'll be getting over it sometime soon." He snatched up his wand from the bedside table and shoved his glasses on his face. "Now, if you'll both excuse me, I have to go do something other that be in your-" he glanced pointedly at Lily- "presence." He roughly pushed past Sirius and paused with his hand on the door handle. "You might not want to be here when Moony wakes up because he doesn't know yet, and I doubt he'll want to talk to you much after he does know."
He left the hospital wing, slamming the door resolutely behind him.
"Where are you going, Potter?" asked McGonagall brusquely as he passed her.
"Anywhere else," muttered James sarcastically.
"I very much doubt it," said McGonagall firmly, pointing a finger towards the hospital wing. "The headmaster wishes to see you and your friends in the hospital wing immediately. I take it you did not ask Madam Gauche's permission before leaving?" The transfiguration professor did not wait for an answer but instead pushed James slightly in the back. He inwardly groaned as he turned and trudged back to the hospital wing.
Lily was still there when he opened the door and Peter had returned. The headmaster was nowhere to be seen. Remus was sitting up in bed with a wan look on his face and Sirius was leaning against the back wall, a sullen expression on his face. Lily looked oddly satisfied with herself and James assumed she had blessed Sirius out. Snape was sitting in a hospital bed with his arms crossed. He was glaring at James.
"Miss Evans, you have to leave," said McGonagall gently. Lily opened her mouth to say something but James beat her to it.
"No, Evans will stay," he said, not looking at her but instead staring at the wall behind her.
"Mr. Potter, I hardly think that-"
"Minerva."
McGonagall stopped talking and Professor Dumbledore stepped into the room. "Good morning," he greeted cordially. "Are you feeling alright?" he asked Remus.
"I'm fine. I'm confused. Why is everyone here?"
"Sirius thought it would be funny to kill Snape!" cried Lily. Remus's face drained of all colour and he turned to his friend.
"You-you-"
"I did," confirmed Sirius.
"You idiot!" Remus exploded. "We could have all been-been-"
"Killed?" Sirius supplied calmly. "I know," he added quietly. "I didn't mean to-"
"That's no excuse, Sirius!" Lily yelled. "You let your hatred for him cloud your judgment! Did it occur to you that if Remus hurt Snape he would be executed?"
Sirius looked slightly shocked and his mouth dropped open. "I…"
"Yes!" snapped Lily. "You aren't two years old anymore, Sirius. You should know better! You're going to be bloody expelled and then what do you expect me to do? I asked my parents if I could stay for a few extra days for you and now you're leaving!"
Sirius hung his head. "I'm sorry, Remus," he said brokenly. "I'll be going to pack then, right?" He shuffled slowly towards the door.
"And why ever would you be going to pack?" asked McGonagall grimly.
"Because you're expelling me," said Sirius.
"No we aren't," replied McGonagall. She pointed to a chair and Sirius, shell-shocked, sat down.
"What?" hissed Snape. "You aren't expelling him? He tried to kill me!"
"Well if you hadn't stuck your big nose where it didn't belong he never would have tried to-" began Peter heatedly.
"Peter," said Remus. Peter closed his mouth and clenched his fists at his sides.
"You will be suspended. For a week. After you return to Hogwarts you will not be able to attend any balls, Quidditch games, or extracurricular activities until January. We considered not letting you sit for your N.E.W.Ts but decided against it."
"No Quidditch?" asked Sirius feebly. McGonagall nodded.
Dumbledore spoke. "100 points will be removed from Gryffindor for this foolish prank. An additional 50 points will be taken from Gryffindor for being out of bounds, Mr. Potter. However, you will be awarded 60 for you excellent bravery in saving Mr. Snape. 50 points will be removed from Slytherin because you, Mr. Snape, were also out of bounds. You will not tell anyone of what you know about Mr. Lupin."
Snape fumed. "Fifty-but-but Black tried to-you'll be hearing from my parents!" he cried.
"Indeed I shall," said Dumbledore. "I expect to see you in the entrance hall in twenty minutes, Mr. Black. The rest of you are dismissed. At least," he said with an obvious glance at Snape, "those of you who Madam Gauche deems cured and healthy."
"You'll need to take this pain potion," said Madam Gauche handing James a vial of blue liquid. He downed it and coolness spread over his body, absorbing into his skin. His arm tingled and he raised the sleeve of his robes to look at the cuts on his arm. There was no evidence of them except for a slight pinkness where the slashes used to be.
McGonagall and Dumbledore left the room, followed closely by Peter. With a nervous glance at Remus, James, and Lily, Sirius headed for the door. "I'll just go pack, then," he said, clearing his throat and leaving the room. James, Remus, Lily, and Snape stared at each other awkwardly.
"Are you feeling alright?" Lily asked Remus. He shot her a look and she blushed slightly.
"Oh, I'm just perfect, thank you very much! What was he thinking?"
"He obviously wasn't," muttered James.
"Don't you dare try to pin this solely on Black!" spoke up Snape. "You all know that you had as much to do with it as he does! It makes me sick, how you'll just let him take the blame for all your stupidity."
"Oh, yea, and if we were Avery and Malfoy you would be jumping in to take the blame, wouldn't you?" asked Remus sarcastically. "You're one to talk about bleeding loyalty, Snape!"
"You're just a pathetic excuse for a person, Lupin," hissed Snape. "You're a bloody monster and you don't deserve to be here. If anything you should be dead, buried, and in the ground! But you're too busy shagging half the school's population to think about anyone else! You thought it would be a great laugh, didn't you? I'd love to see what your dead slag thinks--"
James lunged for Snape but Lily got there first. The sound of her palm connecting with Snape's cheek resounded in the silent room. "Don't you ever talk about my best friend like that again," she whispered harshly, whirling from the Slytherin and running out of the wing. James was sorely tempted to run after her but instead stayed where he was, leaning closer to Snape. He almost gagged from the smell of his hair.
"You heard her," James whispered menacingly. "One more word about Sunny or Ana or my mother or my father and I won't hesitate to kill you with my bare hands. Remus and Sirius will have nothing to do with it!"
"What's this, now?" asked a sweet, clear voice from the doorway. "We can't have you boys fighting. You and Snape can leave, James. But Mr. Lupin has to stay for a few hours more."
James smiled tightly at Poppy Gauche as Remus flopped back on his bed with a slight groan.
"Alright, alright, I'm leaving," he murmured. He shot one last glare at Snape before exiting the room and heading off to say goodbye to Sirius.
**
November 20, 1977
"I can't believe we're missing Patel's class," mumbled Lily, slouching in her seat and watching the countryside speed by.
"Yea," said James quietly. He really didn't want to talk about Patel's class when he was going off to his father's funeral. "I can't believe I have to play your fucking boyfriend. It would have been so much better if we'd impersonated Dumbledore and McGonagall."
"Don't swear. And it's Sirius's own fault he's at Andromeda's."
"True. And we can't ask Peter to play a teacher."
"So is Sirius meeting us at the…funeral?"
"Yea."
"Are we going to my parent's house first?"
"Yea."
"Do I still have to pretend you're my boyfriend?"
"Yea."
"Is Remus really only in the loo, or is he snogging with Peter?"
"Ye-hey, I need to go wash out my eyes with acid now! Thanks Evans!"
"Anytime, James, anytime."
He smiled slightly and shook his head.
"Hey, I made you smile! Ten points for me! Ha!"
James slowly banged his head against the window, once, twice, three times. I'm stuck with a nutter…
"We'll be at King's Cross in ten minutes," announced Remus, shutting the door behind himself and dropping into the seat next to Lily.
"Thank Merlin," James muttered. "I was beginning to go mad."
"I resent that," said Lily loftily.
"Tough, Evans."
"What's your problem anyways, James?"
"Evans, just leave me alone or I'm going to…"
"To what?"
James sighed and resumed banging his head against the window. Peter walked into the compartment and stared at him. "Right," he said. "I don't want to know."
"You don't," muttered Lily.
With a hiss of its pistons the train stopped and they all lurched forward slightly. They all grabbed their overnight bags and exited the compartment.
The platform was deserted aside from the old man that was always there to make sure too many people didn't go through the barrier at the same time. He waved Lily and Remus through first and then allowed Peter and James to pass. The other side of the barrier was bustling with people and James and Lily stayed together so they wouldn't be separated. Peter and Remus had hidden themselves so the Evans' wouldn't see them.
"There are my parents," muttered Lily. "C'mere Potter!"
"Wh-hey!" he exclaimed as she grabbed his hand and pulled him closer.
"Look sad and lost," she ordered him quietly as they walked towards the familiar figures of her parents.
"So easy, Evans," he mumbled. Her nails dug into his palm painfully and she nudged him slightly. "Okay, okay!" he assented, working his hand so their fingers were intertwined. It was incredibly clichéd but he thought that their hands fit together rather well. Get over yourself, he ordered the sappy part of his mind.
"Lily!" Mrs. Evans cried, pulling her daughter into her arms. Seeing the look of rapture on Lily's face as she embraced her mother, James suddenly felt horribly out of place. Lily hugged her father next and then stepped back, taking James's hand again.
"This is my, er, boyfriend James Potter."
"We've met," said Mr. Evans.
"You've met-oh!" she said suddenly, realization dawning on her face. "You did meet! I forgot."
"I didn't know you were Lily's boyfriend, how are you doing, James?" asked Mrs. Evans kindly. "Is your mother holding up okay?"
James swallowed a lump in his throat. "She's-my mother's dead. My step-mother is doing fine, though."
Mrs. Evans looked stricken. "Oh-I didn't-"
"It's fine, Mrs. Evans," muttered James. "His-his funeral is tomorrow. You can come if you'd like…"
"I don't think-"
"No," said James, with more conviction now, "you should come. You really should."
Mr. and Mrs. Evans exchanged glances before nodding hesitantly. "Alright, we'll attend."
"Where's Petunia?" Lily asked brightly to dispel the awkwardness.
Mr. and Mrs. Evans began walking and the two teenagers followed. "Petunia's with her boyfriend," Mrs. Evans said, drawing her lips into a thin line. James and Lily wisely didn't press for details and were silent as they got into the car.
After a long ride they finally pulled up at a house painted cream with green shutters. It was slightly larger than average houses, with a balcony overhanging the front porch. The entered the house and James watched with interest as Lily ran to the small table in the foyer and picked up a square box. She flipped it open quickly and twisted something on the back.
A soft melody filled the room, clear as the sound of breaking china. Lily cradled the music box to her chest and twirled around like a five year old in the snow. The tune was somewhat familiar to James, though he couldn't place it. He looked closer and saw that carved on the box were hundreds of tiny snowflakes.
He couldn't help it; a laugh bubbled up from his chest and Lily stopped twirling to look at him. "Is something wrong, Potter?" she asked, glaring at him.
Lily's mother started at the sound of his last name on Lily's lips. Great, damage control for me! Does she not understand the fact that I'm supposed to be her boyfriend? he thought sarcastically.
Slowly, he walked towards her and put his hands on her waist. Keeping one eye on her parents and desperately trying not to laugh at the shocked expression on Lily's face, he began swaying with her to the melody.
"Nothing at all, Evans," he said. "You just look so cute when you're pretending to be a five year old."
Lily gaped at him for a moment before clearing her throat. "Right. Right, it's a-a gift from my grandmother that I forgot here. I didn't want it sent to me by owl because it's fragile and it may break so I left it here. It's called Once Upon a December. You probably haven't heard it-"
"You're babbling, Lily," James said gently, as if talking to someone from a madhouse. "And you hum it all the time, so I've heard it a lot."
"Right…" Lily repeated in a whisper. "You have a leaf in your hair, James," she murmured, reaching her hand up to pluck the offending foliage out of his hair. Her eyes didn't leave his and the red leaf fell to the ground, forgotten. Almost imperceptibly, both leaned into each other. His eyes flickered to her lips before darting up to her eyes again. He was only inches away, now centimetres; he could feel her hot breath on his lips and it smelled like cinnamon from the jelly beans she had eaten on the train.
The clearing of a throat made them jump apart like spooked horses and James looked at Lily's father, who was raising his eyebrows. Mrs. Evans was only staring at the two of them with a puzzled expression on her face. "Er, I'm going to put my stuff in my room," Lily said shakily, darting up the stairs. James glared after her; she was leaving him with her parents, and they thought he was her boyfriend.
"So, James," said Mr. Evans jovially, clapping his on the shoulder. James tried not to pitch forward. "How long have you been seeing my daughter…"
Yay.
**
"Lily, could I talk to you in the kitchen for a moment?" asked Mrs. Evans, standing up. Lily shot James a look that clearly said 'behave' and then followed her mother into the kitchen.
James looked down at his empty plate before glancing up at Mr. Evans, who was watching him with interest.
"Do you love my daughter, James?"
James dropped his fork with a clang and had a slight coughing fit. After he had recovered he looked at Mr. Evans. "What the-I wouldn't exactly say love."
"Then what would you say?"
"I'm very…fond of your daughter," he said carefully.
"But are you-"
They were interrupted by the sound of breaking china in the kitchen. Mr. Evans got up and hurried into the kitchen, James right behind him.
"HOW COULD YOU NOT TELL ME?" Lily was shrieking, staring at her mother with fury.
"I-I didn't want to-"
"YOU DIDN'T WANT TO WHAT, MUM? INCLUDE ME IN YOUR LIFE?"
"Lily!" James exclaimed, darting forward and grabbing her arms before she could hurt her mother.
"Let me go, James," Lily said loudly, struggling against his grip as her father gently took Mrs. Evans by the arm and pulled her into the dining room.
"No, Lily. Calm down," James ordered. "Stop struggling. Stop. Here, sit down." He forced her into a chair and crouched before her. "What the hell happened?"
"She's pregnant!" Lily spat, twisting her arms from his grip. "She's bloody pregnant!"
For three seconds' time there was silence in the kitchen. Then, James spoke. "I see."
"How could she not tell me something like this? She's too old to have a baby!" She hit James's chest lightly. "How-" smack "--could-" slap "-she-" whack "-not-" thwack "-tell-"
"Lily," James said, exasperated. He grabbed her wrists to prevent her from hitting him and held them to her sides.
"This isn't fair, James! First Ana and Sunny and now she wants to take me away from Sirius and R-Remus and Peter and even you! I love her but I don't want to leave Hogwarts! I'm not strong enough for this…I'm not strong enough for this!"
James spotted her parents standing in the doorway and he stiffened slightly. "C'mon. Everything will be alright! Don't worry about it. Sirius and the rest are coming to the funeral and you can see them there. We'll all visit you all the time."
"Why are you talking as if-"
"I'll miss you, love," he murmured, brushing a strand of hair off her face.
Lily frowned. "What the-"
His grip on her wrists tightened and her eyes widened in realization. "I'll owl you all the time. Just-let's enjoy the time we have together. I really need you right now. Everything with my dad and Evelyn…it's been horrible."
"James," she sighed. "You know I really am sorry, right? I'm not-pretending or anything. Sirius and Remus and Peter, they're there if you want to talk. Don't you dare try to shut yourself off."
"Why, Evans," James said playfully, knowing full well she hadn't been acting. "Do I hear a little bit of care behind that statement?"
"You wish," she retorted, hitting him on the arm.
"Come on. Let's go back into the dining room." James got up and pulled Lily to her feet. He plastered a surprised look on his face when Lily's parents saw him. "Hello, Mr. and Mrs. Evans. Lily and I are going to go for a walk outside."
"Don't be out too late," Mr. Evans said as James dropped Lily's hand.
"We won't," assured Lily. They brushed past her parents on the way out and Lily shrank back against James as if scared of physical contact with her mother.
They burst through the front door and waited until they had entered the forest behind the house before breaking into laughter. "'Let's enjoy the time we have together. I really need you right now,'" Lily mocked.
"Did you see their faces?" gasped James, placing his hand against a tree and stopping to catch his breath.
"Yes!" cried Lily. "Absolutely priceless! They totally-totally believed-" She shivered slightly and James realized they had gone out into the cold November air without cloaks.
"We should go-"
"Oh, James! Look!" Lily breathed, pointing to the sky. He looked up and smiled as the first snowflake fell to the earth.
James was about to ask Lily if winter was her favourite season but the air of peacefulness around her was too beautiful to shatter. Her nose was red and her eyes were slightly red-rimmed; her cheeks were flushed from the cold, her green eyes were sparkling, and her dark red hair flowed down her back.
It occurred to him at that moment that he might just be in love with Lily Evans.
"My birthday's the winter solstice," she whispered. "The 21st. When I was younger, every so often the first snow would fall on my birthday and my dad would wake me up in the middle of the night. He's take me out here and we'd sit and talk for hours until the sun came up. Just me and him and the stars and the snow-snow all around us."
"You're so lucky," James replied softly.
Lily blinked and looked at him. The snow was falling heavier now and clouds were rolling in. Soon they would be in the midst of a blizzard. "I know," she whispered. "I know."
"Let's go in," James suggested quietly.
"Alright," said Lily.
She reached for his hand and James quickly snatched his back before they clasped. She looked stricken for a moment before her face turned blank.
They didn't speak for the rest of the way in.
I hate this. Everything's going fine and then it just…dies. The mood, everything, it all just shatters.
"You can sleep in the guest room," she told him. "My parents are already asleep. My room's just down the hall."
"Alright," James replied.
Lily walked down the hall and opened her door. She paused. "If you need anything just…"
"Alright."
"Goodnight, James."
"Night, Evans."
Her door shut with a click.
If that's the way she wants to play it, fine. I can do it just the same.
His door shut with a click.
That night, two teenagers lay awake in their bed, and when the sun rose in the morning, neither had slept at all.