A/N: Short update. I think you'll like it though.
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A Window to Her Soul
Harry jumped back and looked at her in astonishment. "Wh - Wh-" His eyes were blinking rapidly and through his shock he was finding it difficult to speak. "What did you just say?" He finally managed to ask breathlessly.
He could still see the fire in her eyes as she looked directly into his when she spoke. "I asked you, Harry, if you would like for me to be Cho." She said deliberately.
Harry's heart began a rapid tattoo. All of his worst fears were coming true. How can this be happening? He wondered. What have I done to deserve the life that's been handed me? He couldn't think anymore. He didn't want to think anymore. He needed to run; he needed to fly, to get away from everything. Maybe, if he stayed in the air long enough all would miraculously be right with the world and Hermione, his Hermione, would be waiting to welcome him with open arms when he landed.
He backed away from her; unable to erase the shock that was so clearly expressed on his face. Having forgotten that he'd moved his chair when he was talking with Dumbledore, he stumbled as he made a move to sit in it. He grabbed hold of the bed to right himself then quickly let go as if he'd been burned. His eyes darted back to her and he could see the faintest trace of a smile as she watched him.
He grabbed hold of his chair and yanked it closer, nearly toppling it in his frustration. He sat down heavily and slowly released the breath that he hadn't realized, until then, he'd been holding. He looked at Hermione; dumbfounded and not a little angry at the way she was treating him. He took a deep, calming breath as he looked at her. No matter what might be happening, he thought, he couldn't blame Hermione; there were only two people to blame for this…himself and Cho. He closed his eyes and spoke slowly, deliberately; desperately clinging to the last vestiges of hope he had that the woman before him was his Hermione. "I don't understand." He said, the pain palpable in both his demeanor and voice. "I love you. So far as I can tell, I have always loved you. I may not have realized it, but looking back now, Hermione, I can't remember a time when I didn't love you…even, and most especially, when I was with Cho. Why…"
She leaned forward and gently placed a finger to his lips. "Shh." She whispered softly as tears began to fall from her eyes. Her voice was faint and Harry had to struggle to hear her when she spoke. "I love you, too, Harry. I do. Please, forgive me." She said as she lowered her hand.
He was once again having trouble finding his voice as he watched her cry. His heart wanted desperately to tell her that he would forgive her anything. His head, however, was harder to convince; for the moment his head was winning. He did not reach up to wipe her tears nor did he move to hold her hand. Instead, he cocked his head and stared at her questioningly as he willed her to answer every one of his questions without him having to lay voice to them.
She was silent as she watched him. Her tears did not cease as she began to wonder whether she had lost him. She was just so…angry. So many things were happening and she had so little control over them, then there were the words and…the name…the one she'd heard so often since she'd awoken. How could he not see it? How could he not know what she was feeling? He's her Harry…and her Harry always knew.
She could see the tilt of his head, the questioning look, and the need for answers that she could not…or, perhaps, would not…give. She needed answers too, damn it.
One of them would have to speak. One of them would have to cross the chasm that now separated them.
"Why…" Harry began.
"I thought…" Hermione began at the same time.
He motioned for her to continue.
She took a deep breath and dried her tears with her hands before she continued. "I thought that was what you wanted." She said somberly.
Harry really didn't think he could get anymore confused but there…she'd done it…he couldn't even begin to find a beginning with which to process what she said. He finally decided the best place to start was the end. "What I…" He shook his head. "What I wanted? What do you…how do you…why?" He stammered.
Hermione looked down at her hands where they rested on her lap. She began to nervously twist her fingers as she stared at them. Harry startled her as he gently placed his hand upon hers. She jumped nervously and looked at him. She took a deep breath. "Harry." She said softly. She sat in silence for a moment, looking at where his hand rested on hers. He waited in anticipation for what would come next. She looked questioningly at him when she spoke again. "Do you remember one of the first things you asked me when I woke up?"
He looked to where his hand still rested upon hers as he thought about her question. There had been so many things going through his mind when she'd awakened that he couldn't grasp what she was asking. What would I have asked her that would make her act like this? He wondered. Then it him! Cho. He had asked her about Cho!
Their eyes met…he was looking through the window to her soul…and he knew he was looking at her; he was almost sure of it. But he needed to know; he needed to be positive. His heart began to beat rapidly and the nervousness he suddenly felt was causing him to perspire. He collected his thoughts carefully before he spoke. He couldn't mess this up. He nodded. "I think so." He said softly.
"Tell me."
He took a deep, nearly painful breath and closed his eyes before he answered. "I asked you about Cho." He said.
"Why did you do that?" She asked gently.
He looked at her and silently pleaded with her to understand. "You said that Cho had me and you needed to get back. I needed to understand what you meant." He said.
"You didn't want me to go back." She said wistfully. "Did you want to stay with her?"
"Hermione, I don't understand." He said. He thought his reasons were clear. He spoke earnestly, urging her to understand. "I didn't want you to go back because I wanted you here. With me. In this reality. I didn't want you to go back because I didn't want to lose you; I don't…want to lose you." He stood up to cup his hands on her face. Her eyes had dropped back to her hands and he lifted her head, trying to make her look at him. She leaned her head into his hand and closed her eyes, enjoying the feel of his touch. "Look at me, Hermione." He pleaded.
After a moment she finally opened her eyes. Her head still rested against his hand, only her eyes moved as she searched for his. He moved his head until their eyes met. Neither of them blinked, nor did they move. They started into each other's eyes, words forgotten as they silently conveyed what they were feeling. Finally Harry spoke, "Do you understand me, Hermione?" He said softly. "I love you and I need you…here, with me…for always."
She closed her eyes and moved her hands up to hold his wrists. She nodded and turned her head to kiss his palm. She returned her eyes to his and she nodded again. "Yes, I do." She whispered.
It was all Harry needed. His heart leapt once more as he moved to hold her in his arms. His hands went to the back of her head and as he pulled away he kissed her…her cheek, her head, her hair, her forehead…everywhere with the exception of her lips. He was welcoming her home. He'd known it when he looked into her eyes; he'd known, finally, that it was her. He would get to the bottom of her erratic behavior, but for now she was home. She was in his arms and he could not get enough of her.
Hermione was laughing. She was here. He was hers. There was nothing that could stand in the way of their happiness now…nothing. Some time soon she would tell him why she'd been so angry. She knew now that he hadn't understood because she hadn't been willing to telling him, and sometimes words were necessary; soon he would understand.
He told her there were things they needed to talk about when she was ready. Soon she would be ready. First she wanted to marvel in the wonders of new love. She was in his arms…finally, she was home.
His kisses stopped. She backed away to look into his eyes and they smiled at each other. He watched as she licked at her lips…this time the sight excited him and he moved toward her. I hope this kind of excitement is allowed, he thought…just before he covered her mouth with his and lost himself once more in her kiss. This time there was no wrong. This time was nothing but right…nothing but love.
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YAY! No cliffhanger….
Wasn't that sweet? It's short, but short is vital so we can move on to bigger and better things. Hermione is home but we are far from over…
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