A/N: Here is another semi-long chapter. I hope that you enjoy it. It probably will be the last for a while…although the ideas are swarming through my head faster than I can type them.
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Fear of the Unknown Is?
"Coming where?"
Hermione looked up and sighed, "Can't I get just five minutes of peace around here when I want it?" She exclaimed.
"Who were you talking to? Coming where?" Cho repeated.
"What are you talking about? I didn't say anything." Hermione said in frustration.
"When I came around the corner you said `I'm coming'. Now I want to know who you were talking to or where you think you're going." Cho demanded.
"As per usual, you don't know what you're talking about. I wasn't talking to anyone and I already told you I didn't say anything. What do you want anyway?" Hermione asked defiantly. Her mind was replaying Cho's words, you said, `I'm coming'…did I say that? She wondered silently to herself. If I did, what was I talking about and why can't I remember it?
"I'm looking for Millicent. Have you seen her?" Cho asked.
"She was here a little while ago but then she disappeared." Hermione answered.
"What do you mean she disappeared? You mean she left? Where did she go?" Cho asked impatiently.
"She disappeared. That's it. She's gone. She doesn't report to me and I have no idea where she went. Why don't you go look for her elsewhere? Leave me alone." Hermione said, waving her arms as if to scoot her off down the hall.
"You know if you're done with your chores you're supposed to report to mother so she can turn you over to us. Millicent and I have great plans for you, Her-my-oh-nee. We're looking forward to the time you become ours." Cho said as she began to walk away.
"I wouldn't bet on that." Hermione mumbled and smiled to herself.
Hermione sat down again and paused to think about what Cho had said. She couldn't remember saying anything beyond her whispered words to Millicent after she faded away. "I'm coming"…why on earth would I say that?
Hermione shook her head and decided instead to concentrate on the question Trelawney had posed to her. Why do so many people see fairy tales the way that you do, only remembering the good and blissfully ignorant of the bad? She put that together with what she'd learned from Millicent. I need to let go of my fear of being lonely.
"Fear of being lonely…only the good. Fear of being lonely…only the good." Hermione was nearly chanting. "Fairy tales. Paths. Struggles." She said, not caring at this point that she was speaking aloud to herself; her concentration focused solely on figuring out the next piece.
"People look at the good in fairy tales because…" She said.
"People look at the good in fairy tales because…what?" She said in frustration. She was pacing back and forth and everything around her had disappeared. She was determined to see this through and nothing…
Ding dong! Ding dong!
"What the hell?" She said, looking around trying to find the source of the noise that had interrupted her thoughts. Apparently their not the only ones out of character here, since when do I curse?
Ding dong!
"The bell." She said. Finally. The invitation.
When she got to the door she threw it and was excited to see the courier standing there with an envelope. "Evening M'lady." He said. "Here you are. Special post from the castle."
"Thank you." Hermione said, barely able to contain her excitement.
"Yes, miss. Have a good evening." He said as he tipped his hat and walked away.
Hermione practically skipped as she took the envelope to Trelawney. "Special post from the castle." She said as she handed her the letter.
"Well. I suppose we know what this is then, don't we?" Trelawney said.
"Oh, yes. It means the end is near, doesn't it?"
"No. It means no such thing. The bell was not to ring until you found the first piece. Tell me child, what have you discovered?"
"Is that knowledge that I have to share? Can I not keep it to myself?" Hermione asked. She was unsure of what might happen should it be discovered that Millicent did indeed help her to unravel her own purpose for being there. For reasons unknown, she wanted to protect her.
Trelawney spoke only one word, "Millicent."
"How could you…" Hermione began.
"You are still too blind to see what is before you, aren't you. You've learned so much but absorbed so little. Go away now." Trelawney said, waving her hand toward the door.
"But the ball…"
"The ball is not for you to worry about right now. You have far bigger things to occupy your mind." She interrupted. "Have you finished your chores?"
"No." She said, then hurriedly added, "Almost."
"Get to it then. Finish, and then report to your sister. It's really too bad you know?" Trelawney said as she began to open the envelope.
"What is?" Hermione asked.
Trelawney laughed, "Why…it's really too bad that Miss Bullstrode was not with us long enough to utilize you. I know that she was so looking forward to ordering you around." She said. Softly, more to herself she muttered, "Now I must wonder if Miss Chang has what is takes to use you without her here as back up." She looked up, surprised to see Hermione still standing there. "Did I not tell you to leave?"
"Yes. Yes you did. I'm going." Hermione said, puzzled by Trelawney's words. "She was so looking forward to it…" If she were looking forward to it, she thought, then why did she help me? Could it be that she's really not the person I've always thought her to be? Maybe I did judge her unfairly.
"Oh. For your information, the ball will be held tomorrow evening. You have one more night to work it out."
Hermione closed the door quietly as she walked out. She was starving so rather than listen to Trelawney about chores, she headed to the kitchen to find something to eat. It was late and the kitchen staff had left for the evening so she found herself alone. It's a good thing they didn't try to make me cook, she thought. Probably thought I'd try to kill them or something. She smiled. Even if she hadn't poisoned the food, the result probably would have killed them anyway. If there was one thing she absolutely could not do, it was cook.
After eating she made her way slowly up the stairs to her room. She had every intention of trying to sort through what she knew to try to find the missing pieces. What she did was collapse onto her bed where she fell immediately to sleep.
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Harry had seen nor felt any further movement from Hermione. It would seem as though wherever she'd been, she'd returned. He was beginning to wonder if it might have been his imagination.
He began talking to her once again. "What is it about this book, Hermione? What about it will bring you back to us?" He looked at the cover of the book once more and sighed. "I wonder, Hermione when was the last time you read this book? As crazy as it sounds, do you recognize the similarities between myself and Cinderella? The loss of parents, the wicked family, the struggles, the pain…do you see it Hermione? Is this a sign? Was there a deeper reason for this being your favorite story so many years ago?"
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Hermione turned restlessly in her sleep. She could hear him again only his voice was different this time; questioning and sad. "Harry." She mumbled. "Harry, where are you?" The sound of her own voice surprised her and woke her from her dream. She sat up, "Harry?" She called out. "Harry, are you here?"
Silence.
She rubbed her eyes and tried to look around. The sun was slowly rising and a soft light lit the room just enough for her to see where she was. She fell back onto the bed and sighed. She had hoped it was all a dream.
Harry. Thoughts of Harry lingered in the back of her mind as she sat up and began to think once more about the question Trelawney had asked.
Why do so many people see fairy tales the way that you do, only remembering the good and blissfully ignorant of the bad?
Harry.
"Why do I keep going back to Harry?" She said aloud to herself. "What does Harry have to do with Cinderella?"
"Harry. Cinderella. Cinderella. Harry." Hermione laughed. "CinderHarry."
The voice, still unrecognizable spoke once again, "Cinderella and Harry have a lot in common, Hermione. Think…"
Hermione began to think aloud, "Cinderella's parents died, Harry's parents died. Cinderella was forced to live with people who didn't love her. Harry was forced to live with people who didn't love him. Through it all Cinderella remained good in spirit, so did Harry. Throughout it all, they both remained just as beautiful on the inside as they were on the outside. Cinderella got her happily-ever-after…Harry hasn't. Is that where the similarities are meant to end? Only with the bad?"
Why do so many people see fairy tales the way that you do, only remembering the good and blissfully ignorant of the bad?
"Of course!" She said loudly. "People remain blissfully ignorant of the bad out of fear. We all want to believe that the path from one good thing to another will be easy when in fact, it so often isn't. We hang on to the good in fairy tales because that is the only time we can. We naturally fear what we don't know. In fairy tales we can overlook the bad because more often then not they both begin and end happily…what happens in the middle is quickly forgotten."
Harry.
"Harry has never been able to let go of the struggles because they have always been such a part of him. He's had to struggle along the same difficult path every day for nearly 17 years. Like me, so many forget about the struggles that others have to go through before they find their happily-ever-after…if they find it all."
Is Harry the reason I've always favored Cinderella? I've always felt a deeper connection with him but I would never have guessed that it had anything to do with a fairy tale. Am I to be a part of his finding his happily-ever-after? "If that's it, then what am I doing here when I should be…" she paused, where is he anyway, she wondered, "...somewhere…wherever he is so I can help him? And how am I supposed to help him? We've been friends for a long time, but how does that affect his future happiness?"
"Her-my-oh-nee!" Once again the yell seemed permeate through the walls, surrounding her.
"Ugh…not again." She said in frustration. "I have got to find a way to get rid of them the same as Millicent."
Hermione ignored the yell and headed for the shower.
Feeling somewhat refreshed she got dressed and headed for the door. Ready for whatever awaited her this time…
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The moment she reached the second landing Cho stepped out of her room. "It's about time. What took you so long?"
"What does it matter? I'm here now. What do you want?" Hermione asked.
"How dare you talk to me that way? Have you finished with your chores?"
"Once again. I repeat. What does it matter? What do you want?" Hermione asked impatiently.
"Humph. Let's go." Cho said, grabbing Hermione's arm and dragging her toward Trelawney's room.
"Let go of me!" Hermione yelled, pulling her arm away. "Don't ever touch me again. I may not be able to use magic now, but don't think I won't hex you when we get out of here."
Cho looked at her and Hermione saw fear flash briefly in her eyes before she straightened up and regained her composure. "I wouldn't be too sure of ever getting out of here if I were you. You may figure everything out, but there's still a chance you'll never leave. So until you know, I'd back off on the idle threats if I were you." Cho sneered. "Besides, did you hear mother say anything about my not being able to use magic? If I'm not mistaken, you were the only one she was talking to. You better watch yourself." Cho looked her over quickly then turned and stalked off to knock on Trelawney's door.
"Come in."
"She's finally decided to grace us with her presence mother." Cho said sarcastically.
"Very well. Step aside. Let her in." Trelawney said.
Hermione entered the room, determined once again to show that she was not intimidated.
Trelawney looked to Cho. "Leave us." She said.
"But…"
"Leave us. Do not tell me that her ignorance is spreading?" Trelawney said, pointing from Hermione to Cho.
"Very well, mother." Cho said as she backed out and quietly closed the door behind her.
"Why do you insist upon making us wait for you Her-my-oh-nee? Why must we call you repeatedly?" Trelawney asked. "Do you not yet understand that in order for you to leave here you must fully comprehend what is expected of you? Do you think the house elves that you care so much for could get away with treating their masters the way that you treat me? Do you think your dear, sweet Harry could treat his family this way? No. They cannot. But you do not yet see, do you?"
"No. Apparently I don't." Hermione said. "Tell me."
"This I will tell you, Her-my-oh-nee. If you were to leave here now you would go back expecting to find things the way they were when you left, with no understanding whatsoever of the things you think matter most."
"But what do I think matters the most? I mean, what do I need to understand?"
"Do you not know where your heart lies?" Trelawney asked, her voice more serious then Hermione had known it could be.
"No." Hermione said, confused by the meaning in her words. "I know only that it lies with my friends.
"Friends? Nothing more Her-my-oh-nee?"
"No. Nothing more." Hermione said.
"Then you are not being honest with yourself. Soon you will come to understand. I know that you have learned another lesson. Tell me what you have learned."
"I've been thinking about the question you posed to me yesterday. I think I have the answer, although it doesn't all make sense to me."
"Tell me."
Hermione took a deep breath and chose her words carefully before she spoke, "I think that people only remember the good in fairy tales because they fear the bad. Fairy tales are an escape from the struggles and pain in our lives. If we dwelt upon the bad in them, there would be no way to find comfort in them. They generally start out happy and end happy…leaving the stuff in the middle to be quickly forgotten. People want their path to happily-ever-after to be easy."
"Would you say then that people have a fear of the unknown?"
"Yes."
"And fear of the unknown is what, exactly?" Trelawney asked.
"I don't understand." Hermione said.
"You must think. You have only part of your answer. How does your answer affect you? How does it affect Hermione Granger? How does it affect this hell that you have created? Think Her-my-oh-nee."
"Why are you so persistent? I thought you weren't here to help me." Hermione said, puzzled by Trelawney's questions.
"I have my reasons. I am not all that you think I am Her-my-oh-nee. You are running out of time. You must think." Trelawney urged.
"But I don't know how it affects me. I have realized the parallels between the life of Cinderella and the life of Harry and now I'm left wondering if I am somehow meant to help him find his happily-ever-after. But that's not what you are looking for. I don't know how to answer your question." Hermione said, her voice cracking as tears of frustration threatened to fall.
"What else have you learned, Her-my-oh-nee?"
Hermione took another deep breath and swallowed hard to rid herself of the lump that had been forming in her throat. "Millicent was here to tell me that I have to let go of my fear of being lonely."
"Very good. That was to be the second piece. There is another you were to put together first. That is why I posed the question to you yesterday. You must do it now Her-my-oh-nee. You must find the answer. I'll ask you again. What is fear of the unknown? Can you tell me that? I know that you are a bright girl. Think Her-my-oh-nee. The unknown…"
"Fear of the unknown is…"
"Yes?"
"Fear of the unknown is…" Hermione looked at Trelawney and once again she knew she'd found the answer. She spoke slowly, absorbing the meaning of her words even as she spoke them, "Fear of the unknown is fear of the future. Your purpose here is much like Millicent's."
"Yes, Her-my-oh-nee. Tell me what you fear of the future."
"Aside from being lonely?"
"Yes, child. Aside from being lonely. You know now that was Miss Bullstrode's purpose. What now is mine?"
"In your classes you are always predicting Harry's death. Every day, for nearly five years, since the start of Divination, I have feared that one of your predictions would come true. I am terrified of a future without Harry and Ron in it. Loneliness is an emotion I could deal with as long as I knew that Harry and Ron were all right."
Trelawney nodded and Hermione noted that the smile on her face was the first genuine she'd seen. "We fear the path that takes us from one good thing to what we hope will be another. We forget that the journey is what makes us who we are and what gives us the appreciation for what we receive. If all good things came to you, would you appreciate them as much as someone like Harry would?" She asked.
Hermione could find no answer within her so she merely shook her head.
Trelawney continued, "Say that Harry is your future. If you went to him with no knowledge of what he has been through, would you truly understand him or would you merely pacify him whilst you pretend to understand? In order to appreciate your future you must be willing to endure the path that leads you there, with all its trials and tribulations. Are you prepared for that?"
"Yes. I think I am." Hermione said cautiously.
"You have another question. You want to know if I am telling you that Harry is your future. Here is your answer…I am not telling you one way or another. Your future is for you to decide. Harry has endured his trials and tribulations and is therefore ready to move on to find his fairy tale ending. As such, he is a perfect example for my explanation to you. It was neither a hint nor a clue."
"But how did you know I was…"
"I told you, dear. I am not all that you think I am." Trelawney said as she too began to disappear. "This is far from over Hermione. Be ready for the next."
Hermione called out to her, "But what do I do with that knowledge?"
"In the words of Millicent Bullstrode, `let it go, Hermione. Just let it go'."
Perhaps I've misjudged another one. Hermione thought at she smiled at the spot where Trelawney had been only moments ago.
"So I have to let go of my fear of the future and my fear of being lonely." Hermione said aloud to herself. "I wonder what lesson Cho has in store for me…
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