A/N: I told you I'd update quickly…hopefully there will be more tomorrow.
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The Key to Discovery
She watched him as he waited in anticipation for what she was going to say next. She didn't want to spoil the fun too soon, so she waited … and waited … and waited for him to…
"Whooosshhh………….." He expelled the breath he'd been holding as he released her from his embrace. He looked up sharply at her as she began to laugh. He shook his head and laughed with her. "What are you trying to do to me?" He asked through his continuing laughter.
"I'm sorry," Hermione giggled, "I just couldn't resist when I felt you holding your breath, waiting for me to say something else."
"Okay," He said, trying to regain control. "I'll admit, I needed that laugh, but now you have to tell me what you've figured out. What's missing?"
Hermione wiped the tears from her eyes and sobered quickly, "I was thinking about everything on the list, bits and pieces were running through my head and I realized something. I think I know what's missing."
"You think you know, or you know? Don't tell me you're getting my hopes up here for nothing, now." He said, his voice sounding lighter, more teasing then what he was feeling on the inside.
She sighed, "It's not all of it Harry, but it's a start. I really think we're getting there."
"Well…." He said, hanging on to the very last thread of his patience. "Tell me!"
"It's forgiveness, Harry. We forgot about forgiveness."
"WHAT?" Harry said a little louder then he'd intended. "I realize you want me to forgive myself Hermione, but I'm sorry…what the hell does that have to do with freeing you of Cho's emotions and getting on with our lives?"
"Don't you see, Harry? Think about it…"
Harry took a deep breath and slowly released it as he tried to refill his store of patience, "Hermione…dear…" He said slowly and precisely through clenched teeth, "if one more person tells me to `think about it' without giving me a real answer, I absolutely, positively refuse to take responsibility for my actions. Now…will you please…"
He was taken aback when Hermione started to giggle. "Oh Harry, I'm sorry." She said as she tried desperately to hold back the laugh that was threatening to escape. "I didn't mean anything by it. It's just…"
Trying not to show his amusement as he watched her fight her amusement was almost more than he could bear, so he put up the shield of defense that he'd worn continually for the past seven years, "Yes?" He said stoically.
Hermione sighed, "Oh, Harry, just drop it. That defense mechanism of yours has never worked with me anyway." She laughed. "I can't even believe you'd try it."
Harry laughed back, "Okay, but just tell me what the hell you're talking about. You're driving me crazy."
"I'm not talking about your forgiveness, Harry. I'm talking about Cho's." She said softly.
"What?" He asked in astonishment. "What do you mean? Now you've really lost me."
Hermione sighed, "Come on, Harry. Dumbledore said that the one who harbors the feelings must offer the forgiveness. These are Cho's feelings and she's the only one who can take them back. They live within me right now, but my forgiveness isn't enough. If it were, I would forgive her wholeheartedly for everything that's been done here, but I can't. She has to do it."
Harry looked at her as though she were mental, "But how do we do that? Cho's dead, remember? How the hell are we supposed to get forgiveness out of her now?" His voice was rising along with his temper. "This isn't making any sense, Hermione."
Hermione breathed deeply, "I realize she's dead Harry. Thank you very much for pointing out the obvious, that's really helpful." She said flatly.
"I'm sorry, Hermione." He said regretfully as he reached for her hand. "I really am. It's just…I'm sorry. It just feels like all roads keep leading back to nowhere and I don't know how much more I can take and…" he paused to search her eyes, "…and I'm scared to find out how much more you can't take."
Hermione sat up straighter and channeled her know-it-all persona; the one he always seemed to listen to through their years in school, "Harry, all we have to do now is start piecing it together. I'm telling you that Cho's forgiveness is the key and we just have to figure out how to get it. Are you ready to get started or do you want to continue arguing about it?"
Harry conceded, "Fine. Let's figure it out then." He said crossly. How the hell is this supposed to work? Forgiveness from a dead girl, yeah right! That's a new one on me! He thought irritably, and judging by the look on Hermione's face he figured the best thing to do was to keep that particular thought to himself.
She was watching him closely and she knew exactly what he was thinking. How could he be so damn stubborn at a time like this? So ignorant? Why couldn't he just believe her? Did he really think she had nothing better to do than to sit around making stuff up just so she could raise his hopes and then dash them again?
He's good at that, an unwelcome voice informed her.
Leave me alone! She answered back.
Are you really going to let him treat you like that? The voice asked.
Like what? He didn't do anything… She answered.
Exactly. Nothing. To include believing you. He thinks you've lost it. The voice replied.
I haven't lost anything. Hermione thought in reply. I just have to make him understand.
Can you do that? The voice asked. Can you really make the great Harry Potter understand? I don't think so!
So what are you suggesting then?
Come on, Hermione, you know what I want. Get angry…your own anger. You do know that your own anger feeds me don't you?
What do you mean? Hermione asked.
The voice laughed, oh Hermione, any anger you have is directly related to me…can't you see that? Anger, jealousy, hate…it all comes back to me. That's how I foster and grow…so get ANGRY!!!!
"NO!" Hermione yelled. "I said to leave me alone and I meant it. GO AWAY!"
She looked frightened as Harry rose off the bed and began to back away from her. He'd been looking at the list on the parchment and he hadn't seen her inner struggle. He wasn't scared of her, but he didn't want to upset her anymore than she apparently already was.
"Hermione?" He called out to her cautiously. "What's going on? I said we could get busy, let's figure this out."
"You don't even believe me," She said in exasperation. "How the hell are we supposed to figure anything out if you don't even believe what I'm telling you?" Yes, Hermione, that's it! Said the voice.
"I do believe you, Hermione. I just don't understand it, that's all."
"Well, Harry," She said as though speaking to a child, "that's why we have to `figure it out', you know? That's when we take everything we know, and put it all down and start piecing things together." She looked up at him with dark, angry eyes, "You do understand that concept, don't you?"
"All right, Hermione," He said coolly. "I know what's going on, but I don't know what I need to do. What I'd like to do is walk away for a few minutes to let you cool down, because you are way overreacting. The only problem is, I don't know if walking away will piss you off more or actually work toward calming you down. So…tell me what you want me to do."
"What I want you to do is shut the hell up and let me watch you squirm. That's not too difficult a concept for you, is it?"
"Hermione, listen to me…" He started…then suddenly it him…she was right!
Cho's forgiveness … his dream … his fourth fight with Voldemort … his parents … but no, not his parents…Cedric … the wand … the shadows … the battlefield … the graveyard …
It was all starting to come together for him now and he looked at her in amazement.
She'd been watching him closely; waiting for him to say whatever lie was coming next…whatever words he felt would pacify her until he could figure out what to do with her or how to handle her. His ever-changing expression had her scrutinizing him all the more. "What?" She asked abruptly. "What are you thinking about? What were going to say to me?"
His voice was soft, full of wonder, and the shock of what he'd discovered was clearly evident in his eyes, "Hermione, you're right."
"You sound surprised." She said dryly. She'd expected him to come up with something better than that at any rate. "Am I so seldom right that it surprises you to discover when I actually am?"
Harry shook his head but he could not shake the feeling that he had worked it out. "No, Hermione," he said in quiet wonder, "I mean you're right." He looked up at her and smiled a smile that reached his eyes and made his face shine brightly; reminding her, for the moment, of the boy he used to be. He stepped forward toward the bed and put out his arms to pull her in. Reluctantly she moved forward and allowed him to embrace her and he pulled her off the bed and began to laugh as he swung her in circles. "I mean you - are - right! You did it!"
Hermione felt herself relax against him as the emotions that had building within her slowly began to relinquish their hold; she laughed like she hadn't done in a very long time. This was more than the laughter of soft jokes and light banter, this was the laugh of relief and love and all the other wonderful things she'd been repressing during this time…and he hadn't even told her yet. All of these feelings came straight from believing in him. She knew he wouldn't get her hopes up. She knew he had an answer and right now she didn't even need to hear it, she only needed him. "I love you Harry." She said softly in his ear.
He set her down, excited by his discovery. "Hermione, why did you ask me what I want more than anything in the world?" He asked, although he was already quite sure of her answer.
"Because you want what everyone else wants…love."
"And?" He urged her on, waiting in anticipation. He needed her to tell him the reason. He needed affirmation; to know that he was right…and this was the final piece.
She looked at him curiously as she answered, "Because I knew that you wanted love and that's the same thing Cho wanted. All she wanted was Cedric's love."
Harry closed his eyes and let the feelings of relief wash over him. That was what he needed to hear. He pulled her tight and whispered in her ear, "You're a genius Hermione; a bloody genius. Don't ever let me discount the abilities of your mind again…not that I ever meant too," he added quickly, "but you know what I mean. If there's ever a next time, just smack me in the head and remind me of this moment." He said in absolute awe of her. "God, I love you." He whispered softly.
Hermione giggled uncontrollably. The feel of his breath against her ear combined with his compliments and awestruck tone sent wave after wave of electric shock through her body. She rubbed her hands up and down the length of her arms, trying to quell the goose bumps that he'd caused.
"Harry what are you talking about?" She somehow managed to ask.
Harry smiled his brilliant smile once again. "I'm talking about how wonderfully amazing you are." He said sincerely.
"But why?" She tried again. "What have you figured out?"
He nuzzled her neck as he spoke, "I figured it all out, Hermione." He said between kisses. "I figured it all out because of you and your genius."
She wanted to revel in his kisses and enjoy the moment for what it was worth but she couldn't. Now she needed to know. She pushed him gently away and mock-scolded him, "Harry James Potter, stop trying to distract me. Tell me what you know, right this instant."
He looked at her like a child who'd been told no and she couldn't resist another laugh as he quickly destroyed any amount of resolve she had to get to the bottom of it. Since it didn't appear as though he was going to tell her anytime soon, she smacked him on the arm and stalked over to the bed to sulk, taking occasional peeks at him out of the corner of her eye, then turning her head quickly to hide her smile.
After a few minutes of `torture' he walked over to her and got down on one knee. He grabbed hold of her hand and cajoled her to look at him, "Hermione," he said softly, "I know you're smiling. You can only pretend to be mad at me for so long, you know?" He softly nudged her leg in an effort to get her to look at him. Finally, her eyes met his and traveled downward. There he was, one knee bent, his hand grasping hers, and his eyes begging her to look at him. Her eyes widened. Was he going to…
"I love you Hermione," he said softly, "you know that I do. And all I want to do right now is take you away to some dark corner of the world so we can leave all of this behind…but I can't, not yet. For now all I can do is reassure you and remind you of the promise I made to see you through this. I'm almost sure I know what we have to do to get your life back. I'm not positive, but it's a damn good start."
She looked at him with so much hope in her eyes that he nearly lost all control. "Tell me, Harry, what do you know?"
He raised himself up from the floor to sit beside her on the bed. He grasped her hand tightly in his and smiled as he spoke, "Well, Hermione, it goes a little something like this…"
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Dagnabit! Another cliffhanger! We're getting toward the end though, so I have to a couple more! I'm updating quickly though, so don't be too mad at me.
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