Unofficial Portkey Archive

Tag: Humor

Showing page 2 of 28.

  1. It Happened One Night! by Muirnin

    Chapter 7 corrected, Chapter 8 finally updated... and it is STILL PG13! Attempt at Jakia's Wedding Challenge (as well as MY OWN attempt at writting something other then R or NC-17!) For full challenge details see summary inside. In a nutshell... Harry and Hermione wake up after a night of drinking and find themselves married!

  2. Caught Off Guard:Hooligan of Hogwarts/A Hooligan Among Us by Island Girl

    The Hooligan continues to strike, Harry keeps botching his romance with Hermione,Ron's figured out that Luna is truly lovely, and Draco is all sorts of snarky, bad-boy, sexiness. The Trio's Seventh year has only become more interesting. not compliant to any book after OotP. Last Chapter: The Hooligan Confesses to someone! *** Reviews are SO SO valued! Please review!***

  3. If I Fell by anAnomaLy

    Seventh year wasn’t quite turning out as planned. Lily Evans had always hoped she'd be Head Girl someday, but she never thought she'd be working with James Potter, and she certainly never thought she'd find herself falling for the mischievous young man.

  4. Good News by xelan

    A/U. Ron has been traveling trying to find himself for over a year. Now he has some good news that he's sure Hermione will want to hear. If he can find her, that is. Mild to Moderate Ron bashing ahead. H/Hr. NOT an Affair Fic.

  5. Two Steps Back by Emmablk1

    Lily comes to stay with James for the whole summer!...Wait...itsn't that supposed to be a good thing? Between all the teenage angst, will these two ever get together? Hmmm...maybe with some help with a little birdie named Sirius...

  6. Being an Idiot Can Pay Off by DarthMittens

    One-shot. Harry's in love with Hermione, who doesn't seem to see him as anything other than a friend. To impress her, he decides to jump into the lake in the middle of Winter. What. An. Idiot.

  7. Harry Potter-McGonagall by witowsmp

    Sequel to Harry McGonagall. Voldemort's back and Harry's true identity is known.

  8. Seducing a Girl is Easy...Right? by DarthMittens

    Harry makes a bet with Ron that he can seduce Hermione by the end of the week. But it isn't exactly as easy as he thought it would be, especially when he has to simultaneously deal with Ron's stupidity. R for language.

  9. Captive Love: A Buttercup Outtake by MemoriesFade

    Why is Ginny Weasley in a cave with Draco Malfoy? And why is she in shackles?

  10. The Means to an End by DarthMittens

    What happens when there's a party in the Gryffindor common room and Harry accidentally drinks a truth serum developed by the Weasley twins? Weasley-bashing galore. One-shot. A touch of crude language.

  11. Lovely by LadyAkako

    The story of Lily Evans' life from the day she received her Hogwarts letter until the day she died told through small moments, both important and not. A collection of drabbles, if you will, all put together into a long one-shot

  12. The Adventure by RowlingIdol

    Returning to Hogwarts after the defeat of Voldemort proves to be an adventure in life and love for Draco Malfoy and Ginny Weasley. Humor, Drama, Mystery and most importantly Romance ensue! Please read!

  13. Of Thrillers, Halloweens, and Snigerfanes by owanalilypotter

    "Really guys, you all suck. It's Halloween, for Merlin's fluffy pink bathrobe's sake! Get into the spirit!" Merlin's fluffy pink bathrobe? Lord in heaven, it's much too early for this.

  14. Argus Filch's Tale of Love at Hogwarts by MemoriesFade

    He is often overlooked and ignored, the cranky caretaker of Hogwarts. But he is a man who sees things that others do not, scandalous things. His name is Argus Filch, and he has a story to tell, one that will make the hardest heart soften.

  15. The Unorthodox Proposal of Draco Malfoy by MemoriesFade

    Malfoys are raised to be different, to stand out from the crowd. Draco Malfoy soon learns that this is one lesson that applies to every aspect of his life, whether he likes it or not.

  16. The Wedding Planner by Mara Jade Potter

    Based on the movie! To Hermione's delight, Harry comes home from working as an Auror...only to announce he's engaged! And guess who he wants to plan the wedding??Chaos abounds! CH 15 UP!

  17. A Birthday Surprise by apaidan

    It's six years after the Final Battle and the last person he expects shows up at Harry Potter's front door. Birthdays are times to make amends, or balance accounts

  18. Ten Kisses by GoonerJim

    Harry only wanted to help Hermione out over the Valentine's Day festivities, but she was determined that he get into the Valentine's spirit. And now she's adamant that he get his money's worth...

  19. Draco's Favorite Nurse by burgosdamasco

    Employed at a low income health clinic, Nurse Ginny is surprised to find herself working with new Healer Draco Malfoy. * COMPLETE* Just a warning: Much different than my fic WYWS! Sometimes we just need a bit of fluff in our lives, don't you agree?

  20. The Adventures of Owl Man by xelan

    When crime threatens Hogwarts School of Witchcraft and Wizardy, one figure cloaked in darkness appears to save the day. Owl Man meets his most intriguing adversary yet - Kneazle Woman. Harmony and less direct Weasley bashing. More Rogues to come.

  21. Dealing with a Percieved Threat by SHOULDBEHHR

    Harry and Hermione are the closest of friends, far too close to suit Ginny Weasley. While they may be just friends now, Ginny doesn't want them becoming more that friend later. So she's devised a plan to make sure that they will never want to.

  22. Love Bites by Ecthelion

    They say the way a person eats is indicative of the way they make love, and as Hermione sits at one of Molly's wondrous dinners and remembers this old saying... well, let's just say our dearest bookworm needs to get her mind out of the gutter! Ooo la la...

  23. Alice Evans and the Chamber of Secrets by hermy_madness

    The second installment of my story about what happens when Alice Evans goes to Hogwarts, though it could I guess be read on its own. Having gone through the fights, explosions and revelations of first year the intrepid four are back for more - unintentional rhyming I promise! - and it's not just a rehash of canon. Please R&R it is always appreciated!

  24. Interlude in the Library by anAnomaLy

    Lily is trying to study. James is bored and therefore trying to distract her. Set between chapters 19 and 20 of "If I Fell."

  25. The Halloween Costume Almost-Fiasco by anAnomaLy

    The newlywed Potters are hosting a Halloween party, and Lily has managed to convince James to dress up as... Superman?!

  26. Alice Evans and the Philosopher's Stone by hermy_madness

    Extract: Bob Granger winked at Alice as he turned to the girl who had approached him with a woman who judging by their similarity could only be her mother. “You don't need to go round finding friends for me.” The girl threw a humiliated glance at her father who smiled indulgently at her, “love this is…” He looked slightly discomfited as he realised he hadn't asked her name. “Alice,” she supplied shyly. “Love this is Alice, she's in your year. Alice this is my daughter Hermione.” What happens when Alice Evans boards the Hogwarts Express and how will it change the lives of our heroes? Please R&R!

  27. Hermione's Guide to Newfound Sorcery by the_real_mrs_potter

    Hermione Granger was perfectly content with her normal life. She had a best friend who would die for her, a crush on the hottest guy in school, and was top of her class at Livonia High. But all of this soon takes a turn for the worst when a mysterious new exchange student shows up on her doorstep claiming to be a wizard and her fiance. Yeah, fiance. And not only that, but he claims that she's got some spellcasting in her blood as well. Why is he choosing now to come claim her? And, more importantly, is what he says true?

  28. Last Dance by Amynoelle and Heaven

    A soap opera style fic about the next generation of characters from the core couples of Dirty Dancing. There's still lots of H/Hr in here!

  29. Harry Potter and the Future's Past. by Driftwood1965

    Starts out the day after the Battle of Hogwarts. Harry and Hermione meet the Goddess of Love, and she offers to let them go back in time. Strictly Harry and Hermione. Minor - well maybe major Ginny, Ron and Dumbledore Bashing. Soul Bond - Time Travel fic N/L.

    This story has missing or damaged chapters. If you have a link to this story on another site or a saved copy please contact admin@portkey-archive.org or /u/pk-archive on Reddit.

  30. Boyfriend by Molly Raesly

    Potter was going to say that he wasn't my boyfriend. I couldn't let him do that. For the love of Merlin, I could not let him do that. I had to stop him. He couldn't tell her the truth. So I did the only conceivable thing I could think of. I kissed him.

    This story has missing or damaged chapters. If you have a link to this story on another site or a saved copy please contact admin@portkey-archive.org or /u/pk-archive on Reddit.

  31. The Python Defense by canoncansodoff

    Harry borrows dialogue from Monty Python's Holy Grail during one of Snape's Remedial Potions lessons. It backfires when Snape retaliates and discovers who Harry secretly lusts after. Harry preemptively comes clean with the other witches and true love!Hermione, and then they they retaliate. An occasionally disturbing, often bawdy crack-fic.

  32. Harry Potter and the Champion's Champion by Driftwood1965

    Harry allows Ron to compete for him in the tournament. How does he fare? This is a Harry/Hermione story with SERIOUSLY Idiot!Ron Bashing. If that isn't what you like, please read something else.

    This story has missing or damaged chapters. If you have a link to this story on another site or a saved copy please contact admin@portkey-archive.org or /u/pk-archive on Reddit.

  33. The Rocky Road by MissieMalfoy19

    A week's working holiday soon turns into something different and exciting for Ginny Weasley when she is drawn to a certain grey eyed blonde. But can she really be happy when secrets are uncovered and lies have to be told? D/G, H/Hr, ignoring the epilogue, of course! Please R&R :) Thanks

    This story has missing or damaged chapters. If you have a link to this story on another site or a saved copy please contact admin@portkey-archive.org or /u/pk-archive on Reddit.

  34. A Rather Indecent Proposal by Carla

    'I need you to be my boyfriend.' 'Luna, you... do know I'm with Hermione... don't you?' 'Yes, but don't worry, it's okay. I'm not a jealous person.' Ron's eyes almost bugged out. Every time he thought he'd seen her at her limit of craziness, she managed to surprise him yet again.

  35. A New Opening Night by apaidan

    London is known for its drama. The Mousetrap is the West End's longest running play; Les Miserables, the longest running musical. For soap opera? It's the Harry & Hermione Show, playing at 12 Grimmauld Place. For almost eight years, they've been raising their godchild, making a home, everything a loving couple should do, except for one little thing. Be a couple. Finally Ginny's enlisted the help of a secret weapon to see if we can ring down the curtain on Granger & Potter and have a new opening act, Potter & Potter.

  36. Coming To Salem by HarryandHermionesLoveChild

    My take on the movie, Coming To America. Alternate Universe- Harry Potter is the very wealthy and pampered prince of Gryffindor, who goes to Salem in search of a bride. Wanting to marry for love rather than go through with the marriage his parents King James, and Queen Lilly have arranged for him, he takes along his confidante and best friend Ron to help him find the witch who will ultimately become his queen. Not only must he find a way to put off his pending nuptials, he also has to figure out how to make the lady in question fall in love with Harry Potter the man, not the hero. A hard thing to do when every soul in the wizarding world knows you’re the reason they live in peace.

  37. Nothing Works by xelan

    Albus has always meddled in things that were none of his business, but now he finds himself in over his head in the face of Fate and Hermione Granger. Meddle not in the affairs of Hermione Granger, for you are old and have a heart condition. H/Hr.

  38. Some Industrial Light and Magic by canoncansodoff

    Harry figures things out when Hermione is allowed to dress the Golden Trio in coordinated Star Wars-themed outfits for a Halloween costume ball.

  39. Delusions of Granger by xelan

    Ron is absolutely, without a doubt, completely and utterly certain Hermione is madly in love with him. So much so that he prematurely makes a rash announcement. Hermione begs to differ. Light to moderate Ron bashing. Non-DH compliant. H/Hr.

  40. GrĂ¢ce au Malfoys by romulus lupin

    New Chapter 10. If you're clicking on the 'latest' right now, you may get confused. Chapter 9 was uploaded last night and I just updated this one today.

  41. My Confusing (and Hard to Believe) Love Life by the_real_mrs_potter

    It all started out innocent enough. I signed up for a penpal through the new system that Hogwarts was offering in order to "bring us all together in this new era" hoping to find at least one person who would listen to what I had to say. He turned out to be everything I ever wished for in a guy. But can you really fall in love with someone through letters? Especially if you had never known what the word "friend" even meant a few months ago? *sigh* What an interesting seventh year this is turning out to be.

  42. One Dance by Hazelmist

    With the help of a couple of friends James and Lily suddenly find themselves out on a dance floor together. What happens next is their own fault.

  43. Orange nail varnish by Rid

    pre HBP-When the 'Quibbler' runs into financial trouble,the only thing that can save it is Ronald Weasley and Luna knows that. What's weird is that the 'Quibbler' is the last thing on Luna's mind.- “I mean, I've just always wondered how I'll ever come to know who's the one made for me?” he said. “Will she carry around a board that says `I was made for red haired Ronald Weasley? Or when we'll meet lightning will strike, it'll suddenly start pouring, what? How will I know?” he asked. “Well I've always believed that we have been made in pairs, and for every man on the earth there is a woman. For every blonde, there is a crazy in love Italian,” she said, pointing towards the back of the couple on the other boat. “It's just getting together that's been left to us,” she said, softly. “Meeting the right person and identifying them is up to us. And as for your question- how will you know?” she said, looking up. “Your heart just will,” she said simply.

  44. Harry Potter and Afterlife Inc by dunuelos

    My own response to Reptilia28's challenge. Harry died in the battle with Voldemort. What happens when he meets the Grim Reaper? Especially when the Reaper isn't happy with him. HHr.

  45. Breaking up is hard to do by hermy_madness

    Hermione is trying to break up with Ron except she can't seem to find the words, and that's not her only problem. Told from Hermione's PoV, this started life as a one shot but I think will probably grow into a series. Please R&R!

  46. A Witch in the Family by anAnomaLy

    After an unexpected visit from Professor McGonagall, Betsy Evans reflects upon her daughter Lily's first signs of magic.

  47. In Vino Veritas by addisonj

    In Wine, Truth. In one night, Hermione dumps her boyfriend, gets drunk with Harry, and realizes that true love was under her nose all along. Fluffy one-shot.

  48. A Night Forgotten by MemoriesFade

    Ginny doesn't recognize the room she wakes up in. The same cannot be said for the man she wakes up next to. If only she could remember what happened the night before.

  49. Christmas Cheer by MemoriesFade

    Ginny didn't know that she would end up in the desert on Christmas, nor did she expect to see Malfoy there. But 'tis the season to be jolly, and spread some Christmas cheer along the way.

  50. Improper Usage of a Cucumber by MemoriesFade

    The students in Muggle Studies receive a demonstration of the improper usage of a cucumber. Written for a challenge on the DG Forum.