Authors' note; We hope this chapter makes up for the cliffie from the last chapter. We're not evil, we promise. Enjoy!
"Saf? it's me...Andrew."
She stopped still. "Andrew?"
"Yeah," he said. "I---I wanted to see how your first practise went."
"Fine," she said softly.
He was silent for a long time.
"I meant to call earlier," Andrew finally said. "I wanted to see how you were."
"You don't have to call," Saffron said, hating how horrible her words sounded.
"I wanted to see how you were doing," Andrew said. "I was worried. After New Year's...."
"I don't want to talk about that," she said hastily.
"Don't you think we should?" Andrew asked.
"There's nothing to say," Saffron replied. "You're with Natalia, and it was a big mistake."
"It...it didn't feel like a mistake," Andrew said quietly.
She closed her eyes, fighting away tears.
"Where are you right now?" Andrew asked. "I could come to you."
"No," Saffron said quickly. "I um... I'm meeting my mum at the Ministry."
"Afterwards then?" Andrew asked. "Saffy? Please."
"There's nothing to say about this, Andrew." Saffron said, tears falling now.
"I want to see you," Andrew said. "Saffy, I still love you."
"It's too late," she whispered.
"Don't say that," Andrew said. "You still love me, too. I know you do."
"I was pissed that night," she said lamely.
"You took a sobering potion," Andrew said. "Look, I'm near the Ministry now. I'll meet you there."
"No," Saffron said. "I don't know how long I'll be with my mum."
"Why are you doing this?" Andrew asked her.
"Because it's over," Saffron wiped her eyes.
"Saffy, it's not over," Andrew pleaded. "I'm going to tell Natalia what happened. It's only fair."
"Don't ruin your relationship over one mistake," Saffron told him. "She's a nice girl."
"It wasn't a mistake!" Andrew exclaimed. "It happened and we can't pretend that it didn't!"
"Yes we can," she argued.
"Look," Andrew said. "You go to the Ministry to see your Mum and ring me when you're finished. We can come over here and talk."
"I told you, there's nothing to talk about," Saffron replied. "Andrew... forget about me. I'm no good for you."
"What?" Andrew asked taken aback. "Saffy, you're the best thing that ever happened to me!"
"No I'm not," she said, tears stinging her eyes again.
"Yes you are," Andrew said. "I hate this. Talking to you on the phone. I need to see you. Please."
Saffron couldn't bring herself to say no again. "Okay," she agreed softly.
"I'll be at the flat all day," Andrew said. "Come by when you're finished with your mum."
"I just don't know about everything right now Andrew," she told him. "Just... don't expect too much from me."
"I won't," Andrew promised. "It's enough for me that I can see you."
"I'll ring you later," she said.
"Okay," Andrew said softly.
Saffron turned off her phone and wondered what she had just gotten herself into.
She hurried over to the Ministry, eager to see her mother.
She was admitted right in and headed for her mother's office.
Her mother was at her desk, working on a speech.
Saffron knocked on the door. "Hi mum."
"Hi, sweetheart," Hermione said looking up with a smile. "How was your first day?"
"Good," Saffron said. "I won the scrimmage match for my team."
"Congratulations!" Hermione exclaimed. "That's great!"
Saffron nodded and sat down.
"Samuel ordered something for us from the cafeteria," Hermione told her. "I didn't think you'd want to deal with the crowds."
"Thanks," Saffron said gratefully. "That was really nice of him."
"So how were your team-mates?" Hermione asked curiously. "And did you see Frankie?"
"Yeah she took me around," Saffron nodded. "And my team mates are all really nice.
"That's lovely," Hermione said. She noticed that her daughter's eyes were red. "Baby, have you been crying?"
Saffron looked down. "Andrew rang me."
"Ah," Hermione said. "What did he say?"
"He wants to see me," Saffron told her. "To talk about... what happened."
Hermione nodded. "I think that's a good idea."
"I don't know what to say to him," Saffron confessed.
"Be honest with him," Hermione told her. "Tell him what's in your heart."
"That's the thing," Saffron said. "I don't know."
"When you see him, maybe it will come to you," Hermione said softly.
"I'm scared to see him," she bit her lower lip.
"Why?" Hermione asked gently.
"Because I've already caused enough trouble for him and Natalia," Saffron said. "And... I don't feel like I deserve someone like Andrew."
Hermione walked around her desk and knelt before her daughter. "Sweetheart, why would you say something like that?"
"Because of what happened to Sean," Saffron whispered. "He died because of me."
"Baby, that isn't true," Hermione said softly.
"Yes it is," Saffron sobbed.
"No, it's not," Hermione said putting her arms around her. "Baby, you deserve to be happy. You can't keep blaming yourself for this. Sean wouldn't want you to live your life that way."
Saffron didn't answer. She clung to her mother and cried.
"My sweet girl," Hermione said holding her daughter.
"Everything's just such a mess," Saffron bawled.
"I know," Hermione said. "But you are loved so much, baby. Your father and me, Julie, and Ethan. We're all here for you."
"I know," she sniffled.
"It's going to be okay," Hermione told her.
"Doesn't feel like it," Saffron said quietly.
"It will," Hermione said handing her a tissue.
"Thanks," she blotted at her eyes.
"Don't let this eat away at you," Hermione told her. "You are just beginning your life, baby."
"I'll try," Saffron said. "Some days it's just so hard."
"It will get easier," Hermione said. "I was the same way about your Gran."
"I miss her," Saffron replied.
"I do too," Hermione said softly. "I think about her every day."
Saffron wiped at her eyes again. "I hate that I wasn't there when... when she died."
"She was so proud of you," Hermione said. "And she loved you so much."
Saffron hugged her mother again.
"I hate seeing you so upset," Hermione said, patting her daughter's back.
"This whole thing with Andrew is getting me the most," Saffron said.
"You still love him," Hermione said, not bothering to phrase it in a question. She knew her daughter's heart.
Saffron nodded. "But I just don't deserve him."
"Yes, you do," Hermione told her. "Don't talk about yourself like that."
Saffron shook her head. "I messed up with him back when we broke up."
"But the love is still there," Hermione commented. "If you want to be with him, you could try and start over."
"I don't know," Saffron said doubtfully.
Samuel came in with their lunch and Saffron wiped at her eyes.
"It's good to see you, Saffy," Samuel said smiling at her.
"Hi Sam," Saffron managed a tiny smile. "Nice to see you too."
"Thank you, Sam," Hermione said. "I don't want to be disturbed. Could you block all my fire calls for the next half hour?"
"Certainly," Samuel said, closing the door behind him.
"All your favourites," Hermione said smiling reassuringly at her daughter.
"Looks good," Saffron nodded.
"You up for eating?" Hermione asked her.
"I'm hungry," Saffron nodded again.
Hermione and Saffron sat down at the table.
"I'm glad that you stopped by," Hermione said. "I was in the middle of a terrible case of writer's block for my speech."
"What's the speech for?" Saffron asked.
"The monthly meeting for the Most Extraordinary Society of Potioneers," Hermione replied.
"What do you do there?" she asked.
"Listen to a bunch of blokes like Severus Snape go on and on about potions," Hermione replied.
Saffron wrinkled her nose. "How boring."
"It is," Hermione confided.
"Can't you pass it to someone else?" she asked.
"I've done that five out of the last six meetings," Hermione replied. "So I'm stuck with it this time."
"Hopefully it'll go by fast," Saffron leaned against her mother.
"Merlin, I sure hope so," Hermione said with a laugh.
Saffron smiled. Being with her mother never failed to make her feel better.
"I could pull a few strings if you wanted to go," Hermione teased.
"I'll pass," Saffron made a face.
"You sure?" Hermione asked. "I bet Severus Snape would looooooooooooove to see you again."
Saffron shuddered. "So not what I need right now."
"If you're sure," Hermione laughed.
"I can't believe he likes Ashley," Saffron said.
"I think that has a lot to do with the fact that her last name is Malfoy and not Potter," Hermione commented.
"Could be," Saffron said. "Ash is so sweet."
"She is," Hermione agreed. "And so talented."
"I wish I could draw like that," Saffron replied.
"Me too," Hermione said. "She certainly didn't get her artistic ability from my side of the family."
"Probably from Nick," Saffron said.
"Probably," Hermione replied pushing her plate away. "Feeling better?"
Saffron nodded. "Thanks to you."
"I love you, baby," Hermione said giving her a hug. "And I want you to be happy."
"I'm trying," Saffron said.
"Good luck with Andrew," Hermione said.
Saffron nodded. "I'll need it."
"I'll be home later," Hermione promised. "We can talk more."
"Okay," Saffron hugged her. "Thanks again."
"I love you, baby," Hermione said. "You can always talk to me."
"I know," Saffron said. "I'm glad for that."
Saffron hugged her mother one last time before she headed out of the office. She didn't think going to see Andrew was the best decision, but she also knew that they would have to talk.
She arrived at his flat without calling first and knocked softly.
He answered the door and Saffron felt her heart melt at the sight of him. He was wearing a navy blue jumper and jeans. "Hey," he said quietly.
"Hi..." she said over the lump in her throat.
He stood back so she could come inside. "How was your lunch?"
"Good," she said, folding her arms around herself.
"Do you want anything to drink?" Andrew offered.
"No thanks," she said.
"Why don't we sit down?" Andrew asked.
"Okay," she said, following him to the sitting room.
Andrew sat down beside her on the sofa. "I'm so glad you came."
Saffron moved over a bit. "Well... "
"When I found out that you were missing," Andrew said. "I felt like ...I don't know what it felt like, really. I just wanted to bring you home and make sure you were safe."
"RJ and my parents told me you helped out," Saffron nodded.
Andrew nodded. "I felt helpless most of the time."
"I did too," she said quietly.
"I had a lot of time to think about what happened between us," Andrew said. "The mistakes we both made..."
"I made," Saffron corrected.
"We BOTH made," Andrew countered. "I never should have let you go."
"But then you might have been the one who..." Saffron's voice trailed off.
"I would have done what he did," Andrew said looking at her. "I would have done anything to protect you."
Tears filled her eyes but she looked away.
"I love you," Andrew whispered.
Saffron wanted to tell him the same, but the lump in her throat swelled.
"The other night...the situation wasn't ideal," Andrew admitted. "But, it happened because we love each other and we both wanted it to happen. You know that I'm right."
"I don't know anything right now," Saffron said.
"We can figure it out together," Andrew said reaching for her hand.
She allowed him to weave their fingers together. "What about... what about Natalia?"
"I'll tell her," Andrew replied. "She knows something's up."
"She loves you," Saffron said quietly.
"And I care about her," Andrew said. "But I haven't been very fair to her because you've had my heart. You've had it from the start, Saffy."
"But--" she began.
Andrew leaned forward and rested his forehead on hers. "I love you."
Saffron closed her eyes, her lips trembling.
"I love you," Andrew said again. "More than anything in this world."
"Andrew," she whispered.
"Yes?" Andrew asked.
"I..." she began. "I... love you too."
Andrew smiled at her before pressing his lips to hers.
Just like before, she felt her worries melting away.
Andrew wrapped his arms around her. He had no doubt that this was where he wanted to be and this was the girl he wanted.
She let out a tiny whimper, her arms going around his neck.
"I missed you," Andrew whispered.
"I missed you too," she said, her eyes still closed.
Andrew ran his hands through her hair. "I just want to hold you and never let go."
Saffron nodded, her lips brushing against his. "I don't want you to let me go."
Andrew deepened their kiss. He couldn't believe they were actually here----together again.
Saffron pushed him back onto the sofa, running her hands over his broad chest and shoulders.
Andrew smiled up at her. "You're so beautiful."
"Thanks," she said breathlessly, running her fingers through his dark hair.
Andrew kissed her again.
His hands ran up her back under her jumper, his skin warm against hers.
"You feel so good," Andrew said softly.
"So do you," Saffron answered breathlessly.
He'd missed her so much these past few months. He wanted nothing more than to be close with her again. But, he also knew that he couldn't do this with her again until he'd spoken with Natalia. "Saffy---"
"Hmm?" she asked softly.
"I think we should stop," Andrew managed to say. "I think we should wait until after I've spoken to Natalia."
"Oh..." Saffron pushed herself off him.
"I don't want there to be any guilt or doubts the next time we do this," Andrew said. "I owe that to her and to you."
Saffron nodded. "I understand."
Andrew smiled and held out his arms. "Come here."
She nestled herself against him, closing her eyes. "What is it about you?" she asked.
"What about me?" Andrew asked.
"I feel safe with you," Saffron said. "And... everything that's going on in my life just doesn't matter as much."
"I want you to feel safe with me," Andrew said softly, kissing the top of her head.
"I just don't want to hurt anyone else," Saffron replied.
"That's just one of the reasons I love you so much," Andrew said. "You have such a good heart, Saffy."
She buried her face in his shoulder.
"I never thought I'd be with you like this again," Andrew said. "But I promise you I'll never do anything to screw it up again."
"You really want to be with me?" Saffron asked.
"More than anything," Andrew replied.
"Even though I was so awful?" Saffron looked away.
Andrew tilted her chin so she'd look at him. "I love you. What happened is in the past. We can't change that."
Saffron shook her head.
"We can start over and try to avoid making those same mistakes," Andrew said. "Don't you want that?"
Saffron looked at him thoughtfully for a few moments. "Yes..." she said softly.
"So," Andrew smiled at her. "We're stuck with each other."
"I could think of worse things," Saffron answered.
Andrew tickled her side.
She laughed. "Stop!"
"Stop what?" Andrew asked, tickling her again. "What am I doing?"
Saffron laughed harder. "Andrew!"
"I've missed that too," Andrew said. "The sound of your laughter."
"Me too," Saffron said.
"It's going to take some time," Andrew said softly. "To get back to where you were before, but you'll get there."
"Just as long as you'll help me," Saffron answered.
"Of course," Andrew replied. "Every step of the way."
Saffron smiled. "Thank you," she said quietly.
"Did I tell you how much I missed you?" Andrew asked, holding her close.
"You might have," Saffron closed her eyes.
Andrew smiled. "I'm going to show you how much soon."
Saffron laid her head down on his shoulder, her eyes still closed. "I love you."
"I love you too," Andrew said. "I always have and I always will."
Tears sprang to her eyes again, but now for a different reason.
"I didn't mean to make you cry again," Andrew said.
"It's okay," she said, wiping her eyes. "They're not bad tears."
"Happy tears?" Andrew asked with a grin.
"Yeah," Saffron said. "Happy tears."
"I can take those," Andrew said kissing the top of her head.
"You know... we have a match against each other next week," Saffron said.
"Oh, you mean the match where my team's going to beat Puddlemere?" Andrew asked teasingly.
"Not bloody likely," Saffron answered.
"We're in first place," Andrew countered.
"Only because I haven't been playing yet," Saffron replied.
"Are you talking trash, Miss Potter?" Andrew asked.
"Truth," Saffron corrected.
"Truth?" Andrew asked. "I'll have you know that I was named Player of the Week twice since the season has started."
"Again, only because I just started." Saffron returned.
"You might be so captivated by my good looks and charm that you won't have your mind on the Snitch," Andrew said loftily.
"I'll manage," Saffron replied.
"What if I were to fly up right next to you," Andrew said leaning in and nuzzling her neck. "And I did this..."
"That would be very unfair," Saffron said softly.
"You do what you have to do to win," Andrew said against her skin.
"If that's the case, you won't get anywhere near me," Saffron said.
"Oh yeah?" Andrew asked. "I am fast, you know. "
"And I'm faster," Saffron said.
Andrew sighed. "That's probably true..."
"Definitely true," Saffron answered.
"You certainly haven't lost your modesty," Andrew joked.
"It's just been in hiding for awhile," Saffron told him.
"I missed it too," Andrew said with a grin.
"I wonder what RJ will say about this," Saffron said.
"You and me?" Andrew asked.
"Yeah," she nodded.
"I think he'll be happy for us," Andrew said thoughtfully.
"I hope so," Saffron replied. "I mean... what does he think of Natalia?"
"He likes her," Andrew said. "And she and Audrey are really close."
"That's going to make things awkward." Saffron said ruefully.
"Maybe for a little while," Andrew said reassuring her. "But, you know how RJ feels about you and you and Aud have had problems in the past, but you can get to know each other better."
"I hope so," Saffron said. "I like her."
"She likes you too," Andrew said. "She knows how much you mean to me and to RJ."
"That's good," Saffron leaned against him.
"Everything will be okay," Andrew said putting his arms around her again.
She couldn't believe they were back together like this. Andrew had always been the guy she loved.
"Did O'Neal give you any trouble today?" Andrew asked.
Saffron shook her head. "I didn't really talk to him."
"Good," Andrew said. "He's bad news."
"So I've heard," Saffron replied.
"So," Andrew said. "How are you doing? How are you really doing?"
"Some days okay, others... not so much." Saffron shrugged. "The nightmares haven't been as bad lately."
"I'm so sorry you've had to go through this," Andrew said softly.
"It's not your fault," she answered.
"It's not yours either," Andrew told her.
"Sometimes I have to keep telling myself that," Saffron looked over at him.
"I'll keep telling you," Andrew said touching her cheek. "You didn't do anything wrong, Saffy."
Saffron nodded.
The front door opened and they heard the sound of someone whistling.
"RJ," Andrew whispered.
Saffron pushed herself off of Andrew as RJ appeared in the doorway.
"Alright, RJ?" Andrew asked.
"Yeah..." RJ stared at them.
"I, um, took your advice," Saffron said quietly.
"I can see that," RJ said.
"We cleared a lot of things up," Andrew said reaching for Saffron's hand. "We're...together again."
RJ's eyebrows lifted in surprise. "Really?"
"I'm going to talk to Natalia tonight," Andrew said.
"I'm happy for you both, if this is what you want," RJ sat down.
"It is," Saffron said softly.
"Good," RJ smiled at her.
"I kind of told him what happened," Saffron said to Andrew. "This morning after practise."
"Oh," Andrew replied.
"You're not mad, are you?" Saffron asked.
"No," Andrew said truthfully.
Saffron leaned against him.
"You know," RJ said leaning back in his chair. "I knew you'd get back together eventually and I'm not even a Seer like Maddie."
"Must run in the family a bit," Andrew quipped.
"Can you see us beating Wimbourne next week?" Saffron asked. "Hmm?"
"Without a doubt," RJ said. "You're toast, Kirke."
"Player of the week," Andrew reminded them. "Player. Of. The. Week."
"W-E-A-K?" RJ asked. "Is that what you mean?"
Saffron had to laugh at the look on Andrew's face.
Andrew threw a pillow at RJ. "Very funny. You missed your calling as a comic, mate."
"That runs in the family too," RJ tossed it back.
"Watch it!" Saffron squealed. "You nearly hit me, RJ!"
"What a crime that would be," he teased.
Saffron laughed. "You're such a goofball!"
"Just to make you laugh, Saf," RJ said in a thickened accent.
"He's a poet," Saffron rolled her eyes. She hadn't felt this good in quite some time. It felt like how it used to be when they'd be together.
"One of my many talents," RJ boasted.
"I wouldn't quit your day job," Saffron laughed.
"Thanks," RJ replied sarcastically.
"I should probably go and see Natalia," Andrew said quietly.
"I should get home too," Saffron said.
"I'll come by and see you afterwards," Andrew promised.
"Okay," Saffron said. "Um.... good luck..."
"I'm sensing some mushy stuff coming," RJ said getting to his feet. "That's my cue to leave the room..."
"Whatever, RJ." Saffron said.
Andrew rolled his eyes at his friend's retreating back.
"I love you," he said offering Saffron his hand.
"I love you too," she said softly.
Andrew leaned in and kissed her.
Saffron closed her eyes, leaning into him.
They kissed for a long time. Andrew reluctantly let her go. "I'll see you soon."
"Just come by whenever you're up for it," Saffron told him.
"I will," Andrew promised.
He had no idea how he was going to break things off with Natalia. She didn't deserve what he was about to do to her.
He thought long and hard about what he would say to her and came up blank each time. No matter what he said, he'd come out looking like a heel.
Andrew supposed there really wasn't any way around him looking bad. He just hoped she would be able to forgive him someday.
He used the Floo and arrived at her flat. "Talia?"
She came out of the kitchen, wiping her hands on her jeans. "Hey!" she said, a welcoming smile on her face.
"Hey," Andrew said forcing a smile. "I know I'm a little early..."
Natalia came forward to hug him. "That's okay."
Andrew stepped back. "I--I wanted to talk to you about something actually."
"Okay," Natalia looked at him, confused.
"You---you want to sit down?" Andrew asked.
"I suppose," Natalia looked at him strangely. "What's going on?"
"I don't know where to begin," Andrew said avoiding her gaze.
"You're scaring me," Natalia said softly.
"I don't want to scare you," Andrew said. "The truth is...the truth is that I haven't been honest or fair to you."
"I don't understand," Natalia shook her head.
"I care about you," Andrew said quietly. "I care about you so much."
Natalia nodded. "I... care about you. Actually... Andrew... I love you."
"You deserve so much better than me," Andrew said softly. "Someone who can love you like you deserve to be loved."
"You're confusing me, Andrew." Natalia said. "Did something happen today?"
Andrew sighed. The last thing he wanted to do was hurt her. "I'm...I'm still in love with Saffy."
Natalia stared at him, feeling her heart drop right down to her feet.
"I'm so sorry," Andrew said quietly. "I'm so very sorry, Talia."
"How... how did this happen?" She asked, her voice quivering.
He didn't want to tell her about New Year's Eve. "She and I've been talking since she's been back. We both realised that we still had feelings for each other."
Natalia looked away from him.
"I never wanted to hurt you," Andrew said.
"I think it's a little too late for that," she muttered, fighting back tears.
"Talia," Andrew said. "Please look at me."
"I can't," she said.
He put his hand on her shoulder. "You are an amazing girl and you're going to find someone else who will love you and you'll forget all about me."
"I don't want anyone else, Andrew." she squeezed her eyes shut.
Andrew hated himself at that moment.
"I know this is even more difficult because we're team-mates," he said. "But, I hope that one day, you'll forgive me. I still want to be your friend."
"That isn't possible..." she shook her head. "Not now... and not anytime soon."
"I understand," Andrew said quietly.
"Please go," Natalia was unable to hold her tears back any longer.
Andrew nodded. "I'm sorry, Natalia."
"Go," she said, rushing from the room.
Andrew thought briefly about going after her, but he didn't want to make things worse.
With a sigh, he Apparated from her flat back to his own.
"Andrew, is that you?" RJ called out from the kitchen.
"Yeah," Andrew muttered.
"How'd it go?" RJ asked when his friend appeared in the kitchen. "You don't have a black eye..."
"She hates me," Andrew said glumly.
"Well, what did you expect?" RJ asked. "You cheated on her."
"I didn't tell her about that," Andrew said. "I couldn't..."
"Probably why you don't have a black eye and you're still breathing," RJ commented.
"I know this was the right thing to do but I feel like an arse," Andrew said.
RJ nodded. "I've been in your shoes before. It's not a good feeling."
"No it's not," Andrew said quietly.
"With time, maybe you can be friends," RJ said. "I mean, look at me and Lexie."
"Maybe," Andrew shrugged.
'So you and Saf?" RJ asked, changing the subject.
He nodded. "I think you were right about us."
"I'm always right," RJ said grabbing a biscuit from the plate on the table.
"Things feel so crazy right now," Andrew said,
"You're not having second thoughts, are you?" RJ asked him.
"About Saffron?" Andrew asked. "Never."
"Good," RJ said. "Because, I'd hate to have to give you a black eye."
Andrew had to smile. "Don't worry."
"She's like a sister to me," RJ said. "And I don't want to see her hurt. She's been through enough."
"I'm not leaving her again," Andrew swore. "Not ever."
RJ grinned. "Well, then. What are you waiting for?"
"I don't know," Andrew said. "But I'll see you later."
"Bye," RJ said shaking his head.
Andrew still felt guilty over Natalia, but knew he'd made the right decision. He and Saffron belonged together- this time forever.